April's Real Blog

Wednesday, June 29, 2005

Liz is Gonna Make Me Late For Grad!

So here's what happened. I thought we were all about to walk out the door to go to grad, when Liz said, "Oh, I forgot to open Shiimsa's cage an' say goodbye to her." She said it would only take a minute. Ten minutes later, my Dad's all making jokes about graduating gradually, Mom's stompin' her feet an' sighin', an' I'm the only one who bothers goin' up to say somethin' to Lizardbreath! Then she's all, "YOU'RE UPSETTING MY CAT!" Poor Shiimsa.

An' look at my hair. Liz did it for me--she promised me she would make it all nice, but it looks like she just put me in the Patterson women's updo club. And she took so loooooooooooong there was no time to go over to Becky's house and get something more, I dunno, 2005? I also think the clutchy little evenin' purse is a bit too much, but Mom insisted it goes with the dress. I'm soooo countin' the days 'til high school grad. Remember, two years until I can drive, four before I can drink (yay Canana!), four to graduating grade 12 an' bye-bye Milborough!

By the way, next year I'll be goin' to R.P. Boire Senior Secondary. How foobish a name is that?

Wellp, wish me luck, I think I'm gonna need it!

April out

posted by April Patterson @ 8:33 AM  

19 Comments:

  • At 10:36 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Why did your sis give you Frigid Old Hag hair? You're not like your Mom an' Liz. While we r waiting 4 grad to start, maybe I can fix it. Damn, i do not think that looking like yur mom means u r looking fancy. It means u r looking like a fooby ole lady.

    We can fix it.

    LYLAS Becks

     

  • At 10:43 AM, Blogger April Patterson said…

    Thanx, Becks, u r the best!

    LYLAS

    Ape

     

  • At 11:29 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    That's what Jeffo said.

    Beckster

     

  • At 12:27 PM, Blogger April Patterson said…

    Becks, I heard Brad Luggsworth had to chase Jeffo out of the parking lot outside of the grade-7 ice-cream social last week, cuz he was lookin' for his next date.

     

  • At 1:11 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    everyone sez i'm roadside but jeffo is a much bigger gig than me.

     

  • At 3:04 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    You grrrls don'no me, but I jus' finished grade 9. Becks, Jeffo did the same thing to me he did to you, 'cept it was over summer vaca last year. We "went there" an' he said he loved me an' everything, then he acted all like he didn' know me when school started. U R rite, he's such a roadside gig, but the boyz never get called those things, it's so unfair!

     

  • At 4:43 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    yeah, Apes is so lucky cuz she's a Patterson so she'll never go roadside with anyone an' she'll never get a bad rep. I guess there is a downside to frigidity but at least you never get used like us.

    Hey, your name has two Ks--are you evil or sumething? Ape's mom told us never trust the K people.

     

  • At 4:43 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    oops that last one was me.

     

  • At 4:58 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    i'm just a normal hi-skool grrrl, but i think i did notice mrs. p givin' me the stinkeye once. i didn' understand what that was about, but now that i think of it, i think i had a jacket with my name on the front. that explains her hissin' "double k means no way" as she passed. hey, a, i feel for ya, grrrl.

     

  • At 6:21 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    "double k means no way?" it cant b sed enuf april but ur mom is a dang FOOB. beth reynolds from grd 7 is lucky, her mom died yrs ago.

     

  • At 6:49 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    lol i m so glad my mom ran off with her new boyfriend an' my dad is too busy at work to care what I do.

     

  • At 6:56 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    oh 4got to ask before but does your mom no we are gonna go on the road with 4Evah right after high school grad? or does she still think yur going to college?

     

  • At 7:22 PM, Blogger April Patterson said…

    Becks, my mom's totally obsessed with uni. She's all, "Oh, April, you have to start thinking about what your major will be. Maybe English, like Michael. Or education like Liz. Maybe you can be a dentist like daddy. Or (cough cough) go into business, like your mom."

    Sorry my mom opened a big can o' crazy at you, Katyelinne. Imagine livin' with that!

     

  • At 7:33 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    if you did go to uni, why couldn't u just major in something that no one else in your family did before? how cum you gotta do what they did?

    anyway, don't tell her about 4Evah's world tour--just run away.

    hey u know i heard your sis is a lez--is that true?

     

  • At 8:04 PM, Blogger April Patterson said…

    Mom's got no imagination, that's why she only thinks of those majors.

    UR right, I'm not gonna tell her our plans. I can do what I want when I'm 18, but u know she'd try an' stop us NEway.

    I tried askin' Liz about bein' gay, but she jus' laughed, said I was bein' "so white," an' cracked some joke in Mtigwatsian. I don't think she's into girls, but I'm startin' to think she's into crazee.

     

  • At 10:21 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    yea i didn't think she really was a lez but duncan told me she probably was cuz she didn't sleep in the same room as her bf when they lived together an' cuz she let that sexxxy helicopter stud Warren get away like she didn't care.

    Maybee she just wants to marry some eskimo or whatever you call those people from mtwhatever. ask her!

     

  • At 11:40 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Just you wait. I made sure to dump some bottled water on the stage of your 8th grade grad.

     

  • At 12:33 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    but it will be like 100 degrees in there cuz of all the people so it's not gonna get icy like when therese did it to liz.

    ha ha

    becks

     

  • At 10:51 AM, Blogger April Patterson said…

    I asked Liz about marrying one of the Mtgwhatsies, and she got a dreamy look on her face. "Maybe someday they'll accept me as one of them. . . ." Woooo.

     

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