April's Real Blog

Monday, July 17, 2006

Mike Honours Mom, Yo!

Mike showed up w/his manuscript, all showing it 2 Mom, and she was, like, "A book?!!" And Mike was all, "I've only dun a few chapterz, Mom... and an outline. U're the 1st one I'm showing it 2." ::snerk:: Sitting @ the kitchen table, Mom looking at the pages, she was, like, "I'm honoured, Michael! I really am!" Which is kind of a weird way 2 phrase it, like she's trying 2 convince sum1 of an unlikely thing. Mike went on, "It's set in the '40s, after the war. A young English bride moves 2 Canada w/her soldier husband 2 a desolate farm in Central Alberta... It's a comedy, in a way, but there'z a problem." Mom cut him off, all, "Well, don't tell me. U'll spoil the ending." And he was like, "That's the problem. ...I don't have one." And Mom had one of those shockedy-shocked looks on her face, the kind Pattersons often get when they hear sumthing not-so-shocking. I thot mayB his problem wd B that the idea 4 the book wasn't v. good, or @ least that it wasn't a v. comic premise, eh?

Oh, well, brace yrselves 4 a wk of this topic!



  • At 8:57 AM, Blogger Zandra Larson said…

    Hi April,
    So your brother changed the setting of his novel. It's a good thing, since he kept misspelling "Saskatchewan." Funny thing: all of the Margaret Laurence novels have been stolen from the Milborough Public Library, along with a few back issues of "Cosmopolitan" and The Joy of Sex.

  • At 5:58 PM, Blogger April Patterson said…

    zandra, i'll bet he changed the location cuz of his spelling trubz. does the library have security cams they cd check 4 the books an' mags theft?


  • At 7:51 PM, Anonymous Michael Patterson said…

    Little Sis,

    It hurts me to see you inserted that "snerk" in there, about my having told Mom that she was the first person I was showing the M/S to. I suppose this is your way of suggesting that I was telling a "fib". But I was telling the truth! Yes, I did show my work to that library girl, Sandra Larson, but I've made revisions since then, so I consider what I showed Mom to be a different M/S entirely! So it's not a lie, Sis!

    I even changed my outline. Instead of using an "informal" outline, I added a bunch of "I., A., 1. a.", etc. type numbers/letters to my headings. Remember how I told you about different types of outlines when I taught you the neat outlining trick for your homework assignments?

    And as for Saska, Saskwa, Sassafra--that other place, well, as I was channelling the spirit of my protagonist, Sheilagh, she told me that farm was in Alberta! An artist must be in tune to his inspiration!


    Michael Patterson

  • At 7:53 PM, Blogger April Patterson said…

    whatevs, mike, an' u didn't teach me abt outlining, that comp book from liz did. like i say everytime u bring this tired old subj. up.


  • At 12:48 AM, Blogger duncan anderson said…

    Mike, d00d, u have yr street cred back. Y wld u rite a novel set in Saskatchewan its boring & dusty even Joni Mitchell bailed from there Saskatchewan was yesterday yesterday if u no what I mean. A novel set in Alberta shld sell millions evry1 nos Albertas where its happening now like Calgarys Canadas fastest growing city and r nu PMs seats in Calgary I think u will sell alot of yr novels if u set them in Alberta.


    p.s. If u get invited by the PM 4 a bookreading in Calgary MCDunC wld b pleased 2 b yr opening act.

    p.p.s. I no its hard 2 remember the capitals of 13 provinces & territories so in case u 4got the capital city of Alberta is Edmonton which is a rilly, rilly boring city. Dont set ne of yr novel in Edmonton unless its a st00pid govt or court subplot. I no from reading War & Peace that u need @ least 1 subplot in yr novel.

    p.p.s. U got yr a/c back yet, d00d? If not, come & chill in MCDunCs rehearsal studio. Central a/c. 23 degrees in the studio, 43 degrees outside. Cube!


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