April's Real Blog

Thursday, September 20, 2007

Wonderful years

So, Mom came by bright and early with her notes for the reminiscing. "Do it right, April!" was what she shouted over her shoulder as she left. Yeah.

Well, I made pancakes and settled@ the kitchen table w/Merrie and Robin. Robin wasn't really interested in the pics, so he stuck w/his Hop on Pop book instead. Merrie was all, "So which pictures did Grandma Elly pick?" I sed, "She skipped over the ones w/yr Grandpa John back here in Milboro and went 2 the ones w/Grandma Marian cuddling yr Auntie Liz, while sitting w/yr Grandma Elly. I pted out 4 pix in this lil series. Mom had her hair down loose around her shoulders and sat alongside Grandma Marian, who's holding Liz while Liz loox like she wants to grab @ Grandma Marian's earring. Merrie asked, "Is Auntie Liz trying 2 steal that earring?" I sed, "MayB. In the 2nd and 4th picture, we can C she's grabbed on2 Grandma Marian's matching necklace."

Merrie asked, "Is Liz a kleptomaniac?" I sed, "I don't think so. But she does get distracted by shiny things. Anyway, let's see what the speech bubbles say. Merrie sed, "Y do these fotos have speech bubbles? My friends' families don't put speech bubbles in their pictures." I sed, "It's b-cuz yr Grandma Elly dreamed of being a cartoonist, like Charles Schultz. But she never learned how 2 draw, and she dropped out of uni B4 she had a chance 2 learn much abt writing. So instead of cartooning, went thru all her pix and wrote in speech bubbles." Merrie was all, "WEIRD!" And I sed, "Yeah."

So I pted @ the 1st picture, and Merrie read it out loud: "I must say--I do enjoy being a Grandma, Elly!" Merrie wanted 2 know if this means G'ma Marian expected 2 h8 being a Grandma, but I didn't have an answer 4 her. Next bubble, I read:" I'm free 2 luv and spoil these 2--then give them back when they're tired!" I was like, "Hmph! By the time I came along, Mom had established her no-spoiling-by-grandparents policy." Merrie agreed that this was sad. "I like Grandma Mira. She likes to spoil us." I agreed that grandparents are supposed 2 B able 2 do that.

On 2 the next frame, Merrie read: "No sleepless nites, no diapers, no mess, no babysitters, no tears--" Then I picked up the last frame: "Oh, why did those wonderful years go by so fast?" Mom gives her a little smile as she sez this. Merrie sed, "Auntie April, Mike wasn't there 4 this conversation. Y was he gonna B the one who tells me abt this?" I sed, "I don't know. 4 sum reason Mom has decided that Mike is, like, the family spokesperson now." Merrie was like, "Oh. Auntie April, was this going 2 help xxplain Y Grandma Marian was so gr8? I think Mike 4got 2 answer that."

I shook my hed and sed, "If this family weren't so hung up on wordplay, Mike mite have explained what a 'gr8 grandparent' is. It's not like a r8ing system, from fair grandparent through gr8 and gr8est. 'Great grandparent' just means your parents' grandparents. Yr Gr8-Grandma Marian was just yr father's grandmother. Your grandma Elly's Mom. Your parents' great-grandparents wd B yr great-great-grandparents. 4 Every generation, U add another 'gr8.'"

Merrie shook her hed and sed, "Is that all? Well, now that I know, can we just skip over the rest the pictures while Mom and Attic Guy R away?" And I sed, "Don't 4get yr Grandma Elly wants us 2 do this. There mite B a quiz." And Merrie sed, "Oh, yeah."

Then we finished off breakfast and Mom came by 2 take them 2 school and daycare.


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  • At 7:34 AM, Blogger DreadedCandiru2 said…

    Let's see what what your brother really means when he calls Marian "great", shall we? It isn't the dictionary definition like a sane human being that gives Mike that angelic glow. Marian's greatness comes from her ability to pick and choose when she could interact with children and, this being more important, being loaded to the gills with bullcrap. This reminds me of the qualifications for sainthood posited by a boy genius author we both know, doesn't it?

  • At 8:34 PM, Blogger April Patterson said…

    sorry it took me so long 2 write back 2nite, dc2. the littles have totally kept my hands full. it's like they're so starved 4 attention other than looking thru foto albums, they cd hardly believe i was willing 2, like, play board games, play catch in the yard, do crafts w/them, stuff like that, u wdn't believe it.

    yeah, i guess mike wd consider grandma marian a role model, since he's known 4 hiding in the attic, away from his family, and only interacting w/his kids when it suits him.

    neway, i made sum meatless moussaka 4 dinner. merrie's trying 2 convince me 2 keep cooking 4 them after mike an' dee get back.


  • At 6:44 AM, Blogger DreadedCandiru2 said…

    That's because they're hooked on real food, not processed crap your smug dunce of a brother can pop in the microwave. I'll bet the simpleton doesn't even know what their favorite toys are. What's more, I'll bet he's proud of his ignorance.


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