Who SHRUNK Me?

OK, so I'm freaked abt my mega-boil zits, so freaked I'm even lettin' Ma hug me. She's all. "We scrub our floors, not our faces!" Gah, I wish I had one of those moms who teach their kids abt skin care 4 real, & B4 they scrub the heck outta their faces! But the worst thing? I've totally shrunk, like I'm even shorter now than I was B4 I had that amazing growth spurt overnite that made me abt the same height as Mom! Now, my head like barely comes up 2 her shoulderz & my limbs R all small & spindly. I lk like I'm sumwhere betw 5 & 8 yrs old! That bad magick fr. Corbeil is really kickin' my arse, peeps! So, like, I'm not going 2 school 2day. It's 2 dangerous. The way thingz R going, I wda been like the size of a newborn by the time the bus rolled in2 school.

Oh, & I saw this thot bubble over my mom's head, when she was cradling me as I shrank further 2 the size of a toddler: "My poor girl. She's between a rock... and a hard place." Is that, like supposta B a punch line of sum kind? Does it have sumthin' 2 do w/what we'd just been talking about? I don't get it.

So, Becky's been sharing stories about the Howard doggie, with sum messages 2 me fr. the spirits of Farley & Mr. B. Farley was totally luvvin' on me, but Mr. B's like super angry, an' I can't really blame him cuz he sez he wasn't fully dead yet when Ma stuck him in that freezer. I had this horrible nitemare last nite abt bein' frozen alive & then Lovey, like, almost turning me in2 stew B4 making a pretty coffin 4 me. Egads!

Oh, I got a txt message fr. Alex saying she's home sick 2day 2. @ least I think she's not shrinking, & her skin hasn't turned grotesque. Lucky girl!

Liz & Constable Paul R like a brite spot in all the scaree we've had l8ly. Keep up w/the happy, U 2, I need sumthin' 2 cheer me up B4 I shrink 2 the size of an embryo & vanish. :(

Teeny-tiny Apes