April's Real Blog

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

Neighbour Steve

The horse was eating hay & I was thinking about when kids say "hey" and parents say "hey (hay) is for horses". I hate that, don't you? But NEway, this really cute boy rode up on a horse. He's the one I thought might have been a mirage. Yay, he's real! He lives on a neighbouring farm & he's allowed to cross through this farm 2 get 2 his. Steve is 15 and starting grade 10 this fall. He told me my cousin Laura used to babysit him when he was little. I'll have to ask her for some stories.

I don't have new news from Liz, but I'm hoping she'll leave a comment 2 let us know if something else has happened. Like maybe calling the cops & telling Lawrence about the stalking and assaulting. Well, I'm off 2 C Steve's farm!



  • At 9:01 AM, Anonymous becky mcguire said…

    oh good i think u should totally hook up with steve so that u will have something2 compare gerald 2 an' then you will realize he is a big ol' foob.

    damn girl i didn't think u would be kewl enough to 2 time gerald! u r so cube.

    luv, becks

    p.s.--mom didn't pay the electric bill so they're gonna shut it off at noon today if she doesn't pay so prolly i won't be online until i can convince my dad 2 give me the money 4 it.

  • At 9:17 AM, Anonymous Liz said…

    Holy cow April. I don't know where to start! So I thought it would be with wedding dresses. Though Mom's friend will probably design one for me like she did Dee.

    I really like this one and this one but this one is my fave.

    And April! I even found a perfect bridesmaid dress for you!

  • At 9:55 AM, Anonymous thérèse caine said…

    you stay away from le husband, you housewrecker you! i will claw les eyes out!

  • At 9:57 AM, Blogger April Patterson said…

    see, becks, i do listen 2 yr advice!

    those r pretty wedding dresses liz, but b careful! t. sounds pretty angry!

    (&i m *not* wearing that bridesmaid dress!)

  • At 10:17 AM, Anonymous AnthDad2FranMilboro said…


    I know a certain person reads this blog, and I hope the following touches her as much as I'd like to


    My heart aches, and a drowsy numbness pains
    My sense, as though of Miracle Gro I had drunk,
    Or knocked some balding thug to the floor
    One minute past, and my shoulders had sunk:
    'Tis not through envy of thy happy lot,
    But being too happy in thine happiness,--
    That thou, light-winged Nymph of the Mtigwaki
    In some nefarious plot
    Of meddling mother, and stalkers numberless,
    Concludest my summer in full-throated kiss.

    O, for a escape from Her Bitchiness! that hath been
    Cool'd a long age in the ice of Quebec,
    Tasting of cigarettes and the cognac brown,
    Career, and Francophone song, and the hairy pits!
    O for a beaker full of the warm Patterson,
    Full of the true, the blushful Elizabeth,
    With beaded bubbles winking at the brim,
    And purple-bruised boob;
    That I might drink, and leave my marriage behind,
    And with thee fade away into the forest dim:

    Fade far away, or at least to Spruce Narrows, and quite forget
    What thou among the leaves hast never known,
    The weariness, the diapers, and Francoise’s teething
    In Milborough, where men sit and hear each other sell cars;
    Where palsy shakes the young, sad, last gray hairs,
    Where youth grows pale, and spectre-thin, and dies;
    Where but to speak is to be full of puns
    And leaden-eyed despairs,
    Where Beauty cannot keep her lustrous eyes,
    Or ancient Love pine at her beyond to-morrow.

    Away! away! for I will fly to thee,
    Not charioted by Bacchus and his pards,
    But on the viewless wings of adultery,
    Though the dull Howard perplexes and retards:
    Already with thee! tender is the night,
    And haply the Queen-Elly is on her throne,
    Cluster'd around by all her messy Pets;
    But here there is no light,
    Save what from Elizabeth is with the tresses blown
    Despite jealous wives plotting financial gain.

    I did not see what flowers were in my grasp,
    Nor what soft incense hung upon the boughs,
    But, in embalmed baby wipes, guess each sweet
    Wherewith the orange t-shirt endows
    The breasts, the navel, and the buttocks wild;
    White thighs, and the pastoral between;
    Fast fading violets cover'd up in sensibly priced panties;
    On menopausal Elly’s second child,
    The coming musk-rose, full of dewy wine,
    The murmurous haunt of meetings on summer eves.

    Darling I hug you; and, for many a time
    I have been not in love with careering Thérèse,
    Call'd her nasty names in many an undertone,
    To take into the courts my empty marriage;
    Now more than ever seems it rich to die,
    To cease within the courtroom in some pain,
    While thou art pouring forth thy teachings north
    In such an ecstasy!
    Still wouldst thou say, do I have hopes in vain--
    To thy innermost feminine chalice become a rod?

    Forlorn! the very word is like a bell
    To toll me back from thee to my lonely self!
    Good in You! accountants cannot cheat so well
    As I am likely to do, deceiving wife.
    Good in You! Good in You! my plaintive anthem fades
    Past the Greenhouse doorway, over the parking lot,
    Up the hill-side; and now 'tis buried deep
    In dreams of hourly rate motels:
    Was it a vision, or a waking dream?
    Fled is but one stalker:--Do I call the cops on me?

  • At 11:46 AM, Anonymous becky mcguire said…


    an' liz, u r warped. u r already thinking about getting married--?!? christ y don't u try letting the guy get divorced an' then, i don't know, maybe DATE HIM for awhile first?

  • At 1:10 PM, Anonymous Liz said…

    Everyone is jumping to conclusions. I'm simply looking at wedding clothes. I never said I was getting married to anyone! I simply feel that emotions are a little too overwhelming at the moment and it's just so hard to talk about what's been going on.

    I like weddings. I look at wedding dresses a lot. I have been dreaming about my wedding since I was a small girl. It's a good way to calm myself. So who is weird here?

    I think I could sew Shiims a cute little dress and she could be a flowercat!

  • At 3:22 PM, Blogger Vicki Simone said…

    Ohmygod, that bridesmaid's dress totally looks like the one my Aunt Staci wore 2 her senior prom n Etobicoke n '88. Talk about retro. Maybe the groomsmen can wear skinny ties an' tight roll their pants legs, just like Staci's date & her friends' dates did!

  • At 4:36 PM, Anonymous becky mcguire said…

    liz: "so, who's weird here?"

    that would be your poetry-spouting married boyfriend anthony--the canadian spokesmodel for depends undergarments.


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