April's Real Blog

Sunday, August 14, 2005

Nudist Merrie

I heard that Dee & her mom took the kiddles 2 Lake Heron & Merrie took off all her fancy new clothes cuz her Grandma Mira told her not 2 get them dirty. What a st00pid thing 2 say. Dee got all freaked out about Merrie "streaking". But what's the big about a naked almost-3yo NEway? At the beach? When Dee got home, she told Mike they'd better keep a close eye on her cuz this cd B a sign she has "loose morals". Or, y'know, it cd B a sign she's NOT EVEN 3 YET! So whatev.

Some of Liz's friends have started wearing a special t-shirt, but I'm not sure if it's gonna help:

Apes out


  • At 12:03 PM, Anonymous duncan said…

    My dad made me go w/ him to yr place for his choo-choo playdate w/ yr dad. Liz wasnt there, but Mike was. He made me play like 1000 games of chess w/ him which is weird 'cos he suxs at chess. I beat him every time an' he didnt care. He had those bug eyes happening like yr mom does sometimes.

    I guess I better tell u that I did something stupid. Again. I told yr mom that u r learning how to play bridge. Yr mom thinks it would be great if I learned to play bridge too so that u, me and r moms can play bridge while r dads play w/ the choo-choos. My mom was really really mad at me. She said a swear word I never heard her say b4 an' I thought that she had run out of new swear words when I got charged an' she even threatened to send me back "home" to live with my grandma if she had to hang with "that crazy Patterson ****." So Apes, u got to help me out here. Could you tell yr mom that bridge is an evil gambling game or something?

    Oh yeah I forgot. Do u want me to beat up Jer for u? Except I cant until my court case is over. But Ill think about what it would b like if u want me to.

  • At 12:15 PM, Blogger April Patterson said…

    it sounds like u had a bad day, dunc. our dadz r so weird about their choo-choos. i'll tell my mom that bridge was kortney's fave game & that she played it online when she wuz pretending 2 work @ the store. i don't know y mike is trying 2 b all in2 chess lately. i think my mom mighta put him up 2 it. don't worry about jeremy. he just wants 2 feel important.

  • At 4:18 PM, Anonymous Liz said…

    I don't understand why everyone is so up in arms about Anthony rescuing me. He's a good person April.

    As far as Dee goes, she's been throughly indoctrinated by Mike's madness. I really feel bad for the kids. They are seriously going to be in need of some heavy therapy some day. I know why Dee hates it when Mira buys clothes for the kids. She buys stuff but then she expects to be totally in control of those gifts and consulted on every aspect in Dee's life. If she isn't then she calls Dee up crying, "I have been taking care of my grandchildren! I've been making sure they have been clothed and had intellectual stimulation. And this is how you treat me?" Mira wants the best for Dee and I think she gets exasperated by Mike and Dee's stupidity. Anyway, Mom doesn't like her because Mom knows that Mira thinks that a Patterson is a third rate Sobinski.

    Now, as far as the bridge situation goes. Don't tell her Kortney played bridge because she'll then say "See there is good in everyone" You'll just have to tell her that you promised Uncle Danny that you wouldn't play it without him or that you'd feel too heartbroken for missing the farm if you played Bridge.

  • At 4:56 PM, Blogger April Patterson said…

    thanx 4 the tip about bridge, liz. that's a gd idea that'll prob. work.

    yeah, mira totally thinx a patterson's a 3rd-rate sobinski & u know ma can't stand that.

    w/anthony i think ppl just worry the whole sitch w/therese is like poison.

  • At 6:44 PM, Anonymous Jeremy the Master of the Jones said…

    I think all Patt3rson's are 4th rate Jon3s. Apehol3. R3ally someday you are going 2 & love m3, & so is your mom. I promise. & we will get married and have 300 babies. I love you April! <3 <3 NOT

    I read all the stuff you said about me. I don't care if I have attention or not. I like being a thorn in your side! I like that I get so totally under your & Becky & Dunkydoo's skin.

    By the way Dunc. You threatening to beat me up? Yeah right. You know & I know you wouldn't get within ten feet of a fight without reducing into a puddle of piss. That goes the same for you Ger. But I don't know about Becker's she might give me an STD or somethin,

  • At 1:30 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I'll bet the REAL April can spell and write better than you, lol. This kind of stuff is soooo, well, st00pid, not clever, just st00pid.


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