Think, think, think!
Liz told me what happed next, after Paul told her she needz 2 talk 2 herself more often. They sat down on the couch, and Paul was, like, "Wow. I feel like I've been hit!" And Liz was all, "I'm so sorry. I don't want 2 lose U! ...I'm so confused." Confused? Then, "U cd move south 2! There R so many opportunities in the city! ...Come w/me." And Paul was all, "Let me think. Just let me think. I've lived here all my life. I've only been south 2 take courses... And I thot U loved this area. I thot U loved ME!" And Liz was, like, "I do!!" Ooh, is this the first timeU told him this, Liz?!?!?!? Or just the first time U told me abt telling him? OK, well, either way, Paul sed, "Then, sign the contract and come back 2 Mtigwaki. And Liz took her turn 2 say "Let me think. Just let me think."
So, peeps, mayB there'z hope 4 these two? I hope so!
Apes
So, peeps, mayB there'z hope 4 these two? I hope so!
Apes
posted by April Patterson @ 6:51 AM
14 Comments:
At 9:51 AM,
Anonymous said…
April,
Boozhoo (Hello).
I read your writings about your sister and I thought you might want to hear my side of the story, since you have heard hers.
I don’t have a problem with moving to follow your sister. I think I have shown that by getting the transfer to the Spruce Narrows detachment, which is not nearly as nice a detachment as the almost new one in Otter County. I don’t think your sister understood. I probably didn’t explain it properly. In the Ontario Provincial Police force in the Northwest, there are time requirements you have to stay within each detachment. They don’t allow you to transfer back-and-forth whenever you want. They might be more understanding with a family problem, but since your sister and I are not related yet, they are not going to say, “OK. Paul. Just follow your girlfriend wherever it is she wants to go, whenever it is she wants to go.” The best I could offer is to cancel my transfer to Spruce Narrows, which will not go over well, and to apply for a transfer to one of the many Toronto area detachments. I think it could eventually happen, but it might take a few years. I saw what happened to the helicopter pilot when he was separated by a few years from my sweet girl. She requires someone who lives close. That’s why I put in for the transfer to Spruce Narrows. If I can just get her to sign her contract in Mtigwaki (Land of Trees), then that will give me the time to put that transfer in she wants. I can’t get her to agree to wait. I don’t know why she is so impatient to leave.
Little Jesse Mukwa told me that my sweet girl was very homesick about a year ago, and he found Shiimsa for her to calm her down. He thinks she might have quit then, if it weren’t for Shiimsa. Then he told me at the end of last year, he made a big deal about her coming back and said it was important to him, and that’s why she stayed. I said to Jesse, “Then why aren’t you doing the same thing now?” Jesse said, “I like Miss Patterson’s cookies and I want her stereo, but everyone in the class loved Miss Dokis. The one week she was in class, it was like having a real teacher for the first time. The whole town had to keep telling Miss Patterson she was a good teacher all the time. I organized that star-gazing party for her the night you came and met her for the first time. She didn’t do that. I got the whole town to help. And her classes are so boring. She just stands and talks. I have to tell jokes all the time so it will be interesting. Miss Patterson is hard work. I am looking forward to Miss Dokis.” I was surprised to hear this from Jesse, who is probably the student who likes my sweet girl the best of all her students. It made me realize that probably the only person in Mtigwaki (Land of Trees) who wants Elizabeth to sign her contract is me. My relatives in Mtigwaki (Land of Trees) have told me that truancy had really gotten out-of-hand with my sweet girl, and they thought they needed someone new before it went too much farther. I thought they must have been mistaken about this, but her move may be the best thing for the people in Mtigwaki (Land of Trees), even though it is not the best thing for me.
Since I have read your writings closely, I need to point out that your sister has told me she loved me several times. There was the time when…no, she said she loved baloney and bannock then. Well, then there was the time that we…no, that was Shiimsa’s hair ball. I guess you’re right. This time she said, “I do” which are words I would love to hear from your sister some day. Now that you mention it, she has never said, “I love you” to me. Well, I love your sister, and that’s good enough for me. I don’t see how my relationship with your sister will be able to stand the separation. So, even though the people in Mtigwaki (Land of Trees) want her to leave, and she wants to leave, I want her to sign that contract. I need the time to get that transfer.
Gi'-ga-wa-ba-min' na-gutch! (See you later!)
Constable Paul Wright
At 10:07 AM,
howard said…
April,
Even back last summer when I was working with your sister in Lakeshore Landscaping, she was pretty demanding. She was very apologetic for those demands, but still. If the equipment was not clean and gassed and placed in the right spot in the yard, then she would get this confused look on her face and Lawrence and Nick would have to intervene. Sometimes she would be sitting there with her hands over her face, completely immobilized about what to do. Lawrence would have to figure out what was wrong, like the earthmover wasn’t parked where she expected it, and then he would have to fix it. Your sister was not very good at finding solutions. Once the slightest thing went wrong, she would fixate on it.
This whole conversation with her boyfriend sounds like that. Someone who can see the big picture could easily find a solution or a compromise position. But your sister’s only answer is that her boyfriend must move to follow her, since she has arbitrarily decided to move a month before the end of the school year. For someone like me, who will never work a job that pays much better than the minimum, it wouldn’t be a problem. But once you have worked your way up in a job, your ability to move is a lot more restricted. Most people would understand that, but your sister is clearly in one of her fixated modes of thinking. The only answer she will accept is that this boyfriend follows her. That’s too bad. I would love it if I had a great guy who loved me. I am pretty sure that I would be willing to make some kind of compromise to keep the relationship going. If Mtigwaki were not such a loathsome place, I might be tempted to go pick up the constable on the rebound.
Howard K.
At 3:20 PM,
Anonymous said…
Liz,
I loved the note and my boyfriend and I would love to get together with you when you get back to Milborough. He says that you can borrow his bike leathers again, if you are planning to get around again on the bike you borrow from Gordon Mayes. I haven’t heard from you since you had me contribute some kinesiology stuff for your “career” DVD you made for your school last September. I was sorry to hear that you don’t plan to teach there anymore. I remember how you talked about leading an independent life up north. But sometimes you have to give up on your dreams to go with those things that are really important, like being close to family. I’ve settled in Milborough and really enjoy consulting on sports medicine for the local hockey and football teams. We will definitely have to get together when you get back. Oh, in case you haven’t heard. Anthony Caine is getting a divorce from Thérèse. The rumour is she was having an affair. That’s kind of strange considering how jealous she was of anyone spending any time with Anthony, even Tracey Mayes, eh? Well, people change. That’s for sure. I think Anthony would love to see you, and I’m sure it will be hard for you to avoid seeing him. He manages the convenience store for Gordon Mayes across the road from Mayes Midtown Motors. I just feel sorry for the guy. He looks older than your dad does, and everyone knows what a bad accountant he is. Tracey Mayes had to help him with the books and then your dad too. Now he is a convenience store manager. The last time I saw him, he was bragging about the selection of coffee they have there and their fresh cinnamon rolls. I think Gordon keeps him on, only because he likes him. I bet you’re glad you guys broke up before you went to university. If you didn’t then you’d be living in Gordon Mayes’ old rundown house and thinking about having an affair. You dodged that bullet, eh?
See you soon,
Shawn-Marie Verano
At 3:21 PM,
Anonymous said…
Liz,
I got your note. Yes, Rudy is still in graduate studies at the University of Toronto, and I am supporting him. We will probably have another drinking beach party this summer and you will be invited, as usual. I hope this drinking is not going to be a problem. I heard all kinds of stories about the things you did over last New Years’ Eve, and I hope they are not true. It’s a stereotype I know, but a lot of the kids we knew in school, went up to the North for jobs and developed drinking problems because there was nothing else to do during the winter months. If that’s the case with you, then I am glad to hear you’re moving back home to get some help and support, if this is the reason you’re moving back. I know you wrote the reason was homesickness, but this is Candace you’re talking to. I was the one who had to deal with your mother calling nervous about you every time she got some twitch thinking something had happened. I remember all the times you said one of the big reasons you wanted to move north was to get away from your parents. So, I don’t buy homesick. Don’t pull your passive aggressive bullshit with me, Patterson. If you are coming home to dry out, then I support you 100%. Rudy and I will come from Toronto to see you, and we will stock non-alcoholic beer for the beach party.
Candace Halloran
At 3:22 PM,
Anonymous said…
Liz,
I got your note, and I would have to say I am little surprised by your request. My fiancé, David and I are very happy living in Ottawa. As you know, my brother Brian is in Tokyo. So the only family we have back in Milborough is mom and dad. I think mom visited with your mother 3 years ago, and her dogs attacked her and she hasn’t been back. But, in any case, I don’t plan to move back to Milborough for homesickness. That would be silly. David is a great guy and we have made a life in Ottawa. I just love it here and David has strong roots in the area. We plan to have a family here someday, but in the meantime, I keep busy with graphic design. Besides, with modern technology, I talk or write to my mother even more than I did when I was living with her. So, to answer your question, David and I will not be moving back to Milborough. You are welcome to visit us in Ottawa.
Dawn Enjo
At 6:25 PM,
April Patterson said…
yo, liz, u tryin' 2 get all yr old friends 2 move back 2 m-boro? wow. just wow.
howard, yeah, that does sound like liz (reacting 2 probs).
paul, i think it's a shame liz hasn't actually come out an' sed "i love u". it makes yr relationship seem kinda unequal, y'know?
apes
At 7:35 PM,
Anonymous said…
Liz,
What a strange e-mail. Dee showed it to me and I still have a hard time believing it came from you. Let me see if I can answer the questions you have asked and Dee is going to help me on the details I don’t get quite right:
1. Grandpa Jim’s birthday wasn’t too bad. We kind of sat around his apartment and ate cake while the guest of honour fell asleep. Neither grandpa Jim nor Iris are dead yet. We really would tell you if that happened.
2. April did not really have a family celebration for her birthday. She went out with a few of her friends. You did not miss anything there, except maybe the extreme methods she went through to prevent mom from eating all her cake in advance.
3. As for my birthday, nobody really noticed except me and what I did was get depressed about people calling me “sir”.
4. Mom’s last day at the store was pretty anti-climactic. I think mom and dad and the new owners had dinner at a Japanese restaurant. You didn’t miss anything there, except a lot of unnecessary hugging, according to dad.
5. April doesn’t seem that different to me. She looks pretty much the same as she did when she was 14 years old. For that matter, as I have had demonstrated to me vividly via hairstyle, April is basically the same girl as she was 3 years ago. No new hairstyles or fashion changes. She has the pretty much the same set of friends, except she traded out that curly blonde girl for a curly white-haired African-American girl with a penchant for cowboy analogies. That’s what Dad says anyway. Even if you were living in town, I doubt she would spend much time with you, but I am sure she would would appreciate the thought.
6. Deanna says she appreciates the offer of helping us try to diagnose my son's constant illnesses, but she thinks that she is better suited to that as a medical professional. She also had a few choices words for you, which I shall summarize in a less offensive manner: Deanna says that she is surprised you are interested in our children, since you usually ignore them and have never come to where we live near Toronto to see us or them during your summer or winter breaks from school. That’s much nicer than the words Dee used.
7. I have not seen Anthony since the last time Deanna and I were invited to Gordon Mayes’ New Years’ party over 2 years ago. Dad sees him more often than I do, but he usually doesn’t mention his appearance. The only thing I know for sure is that I am still better-looking than he is.
8. I would love to move back to Milborough some day, because I think it is an excellent place to raise children; but we are not planning to do that this summer. We are saving money and planning to get a house, and that may be in Milborough, but it would be difficult to be there, since my job at Portrait Magazine requires me to be in Toronto. Maybe when I can support myself with just freelance work, we might move. Remember, no one in our family makes snap decisions. We prefer to be slow and deliberate. A snap decision would be, well, un-Pattersonlike.
I think that should answer all your questions, Liz. Let us know if you have any other, hopefully less bizarre, questions.
Love,
Michael Patterson
At 7:36 PM,
howard said…
Elizabeth,
It has been a long time since we have talked. Unfortunately, I am going to have to turn down your request. I regret having been involved in your “attack” last year and still have charges pending on that. So, I don’t think it would be a good idea for me to attack Anthony Caine in the middle of the day at his place of business, so you can “rescue” him with your Ojibway Fu. I don’t Ojibway Fu actually exists, anyway. Every time I have seen Anthony Caine over the last year, I can tell he is still in love with you; so I don’t think a fake attack is necessary. I can tell you from experience, that trying to start up a relationship with a man going through a divorce is not a good idea. So, sorry. I cannot do what you ask.
Howard K.
At 7:38 PM,
Anonymous said…
elizabeth, have u gone crayzee? no, i am not gonna try 2 run down anthony caine on my bike so u can defend him by hittin’ me w/ur motorcycle. i still have scarz frum the last tyme i did sumthin’ that st00pid. i am so glad ur sis iz not like u. u may b kinda pretty, but april iz a lot hotter than u & i wudn’t do nethin’ like that 4 april either & i actually like april. i am tryin’ 2b a lot cuber theze dayz. i think ur goin' nuts & u need professional help.
At 7:53 PM,
Anonymous said…
April,
Boozhoo (Hello).
I read your writings about your sister telling me she loved me and how it might be unequal. I think all relationships may be a little unequal. One partner always loves more than the other. I don’t know that I love your sister more than she loves me. Maybe I am just better at saying it. I don’t like holding my emotions back. If I am in love with someone, I find it is better to just say it. I told your sister I was crazy about her, as soon as I knew I was. For some people, that would be too soon and too fast, but not your sister. She told me later that when I told her I loved her, she knew I was better for her than the helicopter pilot and she chose me. Your sister has told me many times she prefers a man who is open and honest. So, every time I see her, or talk to her on the phone, or write a paper letter to her, I tell her I love her, so she will never think I don’t. It never mattered before; because I could always tell from the way she did things she loved me back. But when I talked to your sister earlier, it was exactly the way she did things that confused me about whether or not she loved me anymore. So I had to mention it. I shouldn’t have, because I know your sister loves me. Her announcement she was going to leave Mtigwaki took me by surprise, so I think I reacted badly. Of course your sister loves me, just like I love her. It may not be even, but it doesn’t have to be even for our relationship to work. All it really requires is that we work together to find a solution. I know we can do it, if we have the time. That's why I need her to sign the contract, so we can get that time. I hope she signs.
Gi'-ga-wa-ba-min' na-gutch! (See you later!)
Constable Paul Wright
At 8:11 PM,
Anonymous said…
April,
When I get my TIL (Toward Independent Living) Program Certificate, I can live by myself; but they will recommend I live in a special apartment for people like me. If I get a boyfriend and he decides to move, I hope he doesn’t expect me to follow him. It would be very hard. If you are special needs, you have to get help to find a job. So if you move, you have to plan it a long way in advance. My mom and dad don’t want me to live very far from where they are, so they will be able to help me. I told my dad that if I got a boyfriend, he could help me. My dad said that I should stop thinking about those kinds of things.
Your sister is lucky. She is so pretty she can decide to move whenever she wants and her boyfriend will drop everything he is doing to follow her. I would like to be that pretty. Of course, if I was that pretty and I had a boyfriend, I would be really nice to him. But he would have to understand, I can’t move to follow him. Not easily, anyway. I don’t understand your sister.
I have heard really pretty girls are selfish and mean. The A-girls in school are really pretty and they are the meanest girls in school. Why do boys like mean girls? Who cares what you look like, if you are going to be mean? You are very pretty, April, and you are one of the nicest girls in school. I think your sister’s boyfriend wishes he was dating you and not your sister. Except you are too young to date him, so that is not going to happen. I wish I had a boyfriend.
Love,
Shannon Lake
At 9:13 PM,
April Patterson said…
liz, omg, what r u up 2?!?!?!?!
paul, i hope u r rite an' i also hope liz signs the contract.
shannon, ever since the other sn kidz found out that u never really sed thoze bad thingz abt them, i've noticed sum of the sn boyz have been giving u the eye! have u noticed?
apes
At 9:19 PM,
Anonymous said…
April,
The boy with the glass eye does not count.
Love,
Shannon Lake
At 9:52 PM,
April Patterson said…
shan, so that's why that guy always seems to be starin' @ peeps w/that 1 eye!
liz, i just got yr e-mail. lemme see abt answering yr questions b4 i get 2 the special requests.
1. i don't think i'm ne taller than i was the last time u me, back in january. if i am, it's def less than an inch.
2. like mike sez, my hair is unchanged. like i have a choice.
3. no, mom's cooking hasn't gotten ne better. same casserolez as ever.
4. dad hasn't told me ne new stuff abt anthony since the whole "buying the car" day when he an' anth hung out @ the gordo restaurant.
5. i can't really answer u abt whether ger and i have dun nething u wdn't do, cuz u never have been v. clear abt what u wd or wdn't do.
6. no, i haven't been borrowing yr stuff, since u put the dye packs in yr drawers and spring traps in the closets.
7. dad still wears the dorky engineer's costume.
8. mr. henderson never asks me abt u, sorry.
9. i tried listening really hard 2 eddie an' dixie's barks, but i haven't been able 2 notice them trying 2 say "liz" or "shiimsa".
10. no, dawn, shawna-marie, and candace haven't called me 2 ask me 2 help look 4 apartments in mboro. were they supposed 2?
abt yr requests, no, i'm not gonna get a bowlcut an' start callin' myself "aypo" again. i don't care if that wd help make u feel more "@ home" or whatevs. and i'm def not gonna tie a sock around my head an' call myself "sockhead." sorry!
apes
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