Recapping 2 Liz again!
Liz has been so quiet l8ly, I figged I'd send her another upd8. So I e-mailed:
When I was typing my message, I was also thinking about how the keyz always go "tap tick-tap tap, tick tap-tap, tikka." An' it's the same with all they keyboards my fam memberz use. Weird. Also, I type with my handz flying way up over the keyboard, insteada keeping my hands grounded on the home keyz like they taught us in the keyboarding class we hadta take in grade 8. It's a wonder I can touch-type that way!
And Y'd I use "amazing"? I have this feeling every1's way overusing that word l8ly!
Apes
Dear Elizabeth, guess what! We got a new keyboard player and our band is gonna be even better than it was before! The new name is "4Evah and Eva"--'cause Eva is our lead singer, and she is AMAZING! Gerald an' I are still a "couple" and that's so cool. My marks are good, an' I've got summer work lined up.... So, everything is great right now! My life is really coming together!Liz wrote back that the first thing she thot after reading my message was "...And mine if falling apart." That's all she told me. Didn't xplain. I wonder what's up w/her. I mite have more 2 tell abt her 2morrow. I hope so, cuz that mite B an interesting topic, eh?
Love, April
When I was typing my message, I was also thinking about how the keyz always go "tap tick-tap tap, tick tap-tap, tikka." An' it's the same with all they keyboards my fam memberz use. Weird. Also, I type with my handz flying way up over the keyboard, insteada keeping my hands grounded on the home keyz like they taught us in the keyboarding class we hadta take in grade 8. It's a wonder I can touch-type that way!
And Y'd I use "amazing"? I have this feeling every1's way overusing that word l8ly!
Apes
posted by April Patterson @ 7:00 AM
36 Comments:
At 9:35 AM,
Anonymous said…
April,
Little sis. “Amazing” is one of those words Mom and Dad use a lot. I didn’t realize how often I used the word in casual speech until university, when one of my profs said that every essay I wrote, he was going to take off points for each time I used the word “amazing”. I became really conscious of it then, and I noticed when I came back home for the holidays, how often we Pattersons and our friends use the word. Even today, when I write one of my superb columns describing my opinion on something I find amazing….scratch that…interesting in the world, I find the word sometimes creeps in, just like it just did. Humans are such creatures of habit and when you have been raised by such amazing…I mean excellent parents, as we were, then you find you want to emulate them as much as possible.
About your keyboarding skills, I do not know what your complaints are. It sounds like you do typewriting just the same way I do, except with perhaps fewer Tick-Taps, due to my greater experience and amazing…more developed typing skills. As for Liz and her life falling apart, I doubt there is anything to worry about. She’s probably concerned she hasn’t been able to get to the mall since January. She hasn’t had a legitimate complaint about her life in years, and that is amazing (word intended).
Love,
Michael Patterson
At 9:50 AM,
Anonymous said…
April,
Boozhoo (Hello).
I read your writings about your e-mail to your sister. I do not really know what she meant when she said her life is falling apart. Your sister and I still speak every day, but lately we have talked a lot about the weather and Shiimsa’s habit of sleeping right beside her computer terminal. The last time I was in Mtigwaki (Land of Trees) my relatives told me how my sweet girl’s teaching evaluation for this year went. Don’t ask how my relatives would know such a thing, but in Mtigwaki (Land of Trees) there are no secrets. I hope she can forgive me, but I am so anxious to learn new things about my sweet girl, I listened to what my relatives told me.
Her evaluation said:
1. Skills in speaking Ojibway have not increased over two years. Condition of hiring depends on gaining skills in this area.
2. Doesn’t adhere to provincial education requirements. Prefers to develop her own curriculum, often using video tapes to teach when unable to come up with her own lesson, or when feeling sick.
3. Focused heavily on one problem student (Jesse Mukwa) and apparently made good progress with him. However, this is possible favoritism. Many class sessions, observed her lessons appeared to be for no other reason than to lead the problem student to say some joke, encouraging his poor behaviour.
4. Has not eliminated truancy problems. Students are still absent with claims of tending trap lines, sick relatives, etc.
5. Lack of respect from students. Student teacher assaulted with snowball in front of this teacher.
6. Has been caught referring to teaching schools in the south as a “real” job.
7. Has never established proper parent-teacher relationship. Parental involvement in out-of-school activities has been only at the prompting of the parents and students.
This evaluation does not look good, so it may be your sister is talking about her job. Maybe if you ask her, she will tell you. I have not had much luck, and I want to help out my sweet girl, if I can. She is the most important thing in my life.
Gi'-ga-wa-ba-min' na-gutch! (See you later!)
Constable Paul Wright
At 10:01 AM,
Anonymous said…
april, that wuz a confusin’ blog entry. ru sayin’ u & gerald were havin’ problemz, & they r settled now? i can b-lieve u & gerald were havin’ problemz w/all this weird viking stuff. but ur marks. ru sayin’ u had problemz w/ur marks & they r bettah now? i thot u were doin’ good n skool. i know i have been doin’ gr8 n skool, since i started studyin’ w/eva. she may say “hafta” and “an’” all the tyme wen she talks, but she iz a good studier. the othah confuzin’ thing iz ru sayin’ u guyz rilly picked that band name cuz eva iz the lead singah & she iz “amazin’”. i think eva iz “amazin’” 2, but i dunno if she iz so much bettah than rebeccah that u hafta name the band aftah her. otherwise u woulda called the band 4evah & rebeccah, eh? i thot u just picked that band name cuz it wuz a pun or sumthin’. also, wut iz this ‘bout summer work lined up. i thot u were goin’ 2 winnipeg & sittin’ n @ur cuz’s vet clinic? iz that wut ur talkin’ ‘bout? or ru talkin’ ‘bout sumthin’ local thass not lilliput’s. cuz if u did sumthin’ othah than lilliput’s that wud be so cube. i wud luv 2c ur mom’s reaction wen u told her that her spy wuz goin’ sumplace else. neway, i know ur sis likes 2 keep peeps n the dark, but u can tell me & ur othah friendz stuff, eh?
At 10:04 AM,
Anonymous said…
April,
Is the way you type the reason you sometimes don't write back to me? I may be special needs, but I know how to type with my hands on the keyboard home row. Do you want me to teach you? I am a very good teacher, even if it takes me awhile to say the lesson. You've been so nice to me, I can pay you back with some typing lessons.
Love,
Shannon Lake
At 10:15 AM,
howard said…
April,
I was up last night knitting some socks for Becky, which she is wearing to school today. I think they look good on her, but they may not be colourful enough for your sock standards.
I am glad to see you are still writing to your sister, and I hope she has the good sense to stay far, far away from Anthony Caine. I fear when she told you her life is falling apart, it had something to do with that man. After my experience with him last summer and the ear-tweaking, I think he needs to be left alone until he can come to grips with the fact he went to such ridiculously great lengths to make himself look good in front of your sister. Now that I am engaged to Becky and planning to have children with her, I realize just how reprehensible Anthony Caine’s behaviour was, since he was married to a woman who cared enough about him to be jealous of other women and of course, his newly born baby girl. I deeply regret my involvement in the whole matter. I wish that I had not been so easily fooled into believing I was helping reconcile a granddaughter and grandfather, but even today, when I see Anthony Caine, I still cannot believe he is only 25 years old, and I can easily see how I made that mistake last August. That doesn’t excuse my part in it. I hope you will advise your sister the same way about Anthony Caine.
Howard K.
At 3:49 PM,
Anonymous said…
April,
I am having a really bad day. On top of my life falling apart--which I don't want to talk about yet--I am having a medical crisis.
Last night when I got up from the computer after talking to you, I went and looked in the mirror. My face was all puffy and my lips were swollen. They were almost as big as Dee's! I decided it was probably just from the crying, so I went about my day as usual. (No, I am not going to tell you why I was crying, so don't ask.)
But, then I ran into Viv, and she freaked out. She said, "Oh my God, Liz, your face looks terrible!" Which was just one more thing to make my life fall apart, because who will ever want to marry me if I turn ugly? Viv dragged me to the nurse's station and gave me some Bendadryl.
Viv says I must be having an allergic response to something. She said that since this hasn't happened before, I need to think about what new substances I have touched or eaten lately. But I can't think of anything.
Then Viv said that sometimes a person can become allergic to something they used to have around and love all the time, like copper or cashew nuts. The only thing I could think of there is how I love Mtigwaki, but I am not as fond of it anymore. Maybe I have become allergic? Or, how, in my love life, I hang on to a guy until it starts to become really serious, and then our relationship peters out. Maybe I am allergic to love--?
I didn't say any of that to Viv, though. I am kind of thinking I shouldn't be saying it to you either, but I can't get Candace on the phone, so you'll have to do. Just don't tell anyone. I don't want anyone knowing my business. Especially not Mom! She will just want to talk to me about it.
Liz
At 6:07 PM,
Anonymous said…
Lizardbreath,
Big lips as an allergic reaction? There might be some possibilities there. It may be too long ago for you to remember, but when I first met my pretty girl, beautiful Deanna she did not have the lips that she does today. Her lips were the same as yours or mine at that age. But then after she left and went to Burlington, Deanna and her dreadful mother, both developed large lips. I thought that when my daughter was born, she would be like me or like Deanna at that age and have small lips too. Much to my surprise, her lips are almost bigger than Deanna’s. I don’t know how big they will be when she grows up. Not too big I hope. I don’t want to have a deformed daughter.
But then I saw your message to little sis today and I suddenly realized, it’s leaving Milborough that is giving you big lips. My daughter doesn’t live in Milborough. You don’t live in Milborough. And of course, my darling wife Deanna and her mother left Milborough small-lipped and came back big-lipped. That is the common factor. I think the problem with your lips is that you don’t live in Milborough. If you want to keep those smallish Patterson-like lips, you should probably move back to Milborough at the earliest possible opportunity.
Plus, the shopping has to be a lot better than wherever it is you live now.
Love,
Michael Patterson
At 7:03 PM,
Anonymous said…
Mike,
I don't want to talk about it.
Liz
P.S.: Stop calling me Lizardbreath! I can't believe what an abusive older brother you are.
At 7:10 PM,
April Patterson said…
wow, sorry 2 hear abt liz's evaluation! liz, i'm sorry u're goin' thru such a ruff time.
jeremy, the thing abt how ger an' i r still a "couple" was cuz of sumthin' liz sed when ger an' i 1st started being bf/gf. she was, like, "april if u and gerald r still a 'couple' by the end of grade 9, i am going 2 eat my hat!" i'm not sure what hat she meant, but i wanted 2 remind her.
my marks in school have been good all along, but 4 sum reason liz was worried, so i wanted 2 ease her mind.
the band name was cuz of ger'z pun, tho i also think eva is v. v. talented. becks is, 2. her name nev got singled out cuz there wasn't a becky pun. also, i guess it wda been "3evah an' becky" unless we'd gotten a new member back when becks was still w/us.
u know, i wanna tell u abt my summer planz, but i am having 1 of thoze weird memory gaps i get fr. time 2 time. sorry abt that!
shan, my typing is actually v. good, strangely enuf. an' i do write back 2 u every time. but there r timez when yr e-mail bounces. when this happs there is a little message @ the bottom saying the message was flagged by the "safemail" mail filterz, installed by blair lake. i'm sorry i 4got 2 mention that 2 u sooner!
howard, i don't know y u think that abt my "colourful sock standardz". it's not like i actually bot thoze butt-ugly socks i imagined wearing when mom took me sock shopping back in september!
i agree that liz shd stay away fr. anthony.
btw, mike, u were wrong abt me missing an opp 2 shame dad a coupla sats ago. u know what he just told me? that when i sed that thing abt how he didn't need 2 worry cuz luis's dad was in the car, he felt more shame than if i'd given him an hour-long "shame on you" lecture. cuz it made him think abt how irresponsible he'd been. so there!
becks, that xplainz y luis had that huge smile on his face when i saw him after school!!!
apes
At 7:22 PM,
duncan anderson said…
Hey, Apes!
I got hired @ the Mboro Public Library 4 the summer. They were rilly impressed that I did my book report on War & Peace.
Im glad u have a summer job lined up. Where r u working? My mom heard u r working @ Lilliputs. Zeds mom heard u r working 4 yr dad. Zed heard u r washing dishes @ the Valhalla. Jer heard u r baking @ Krystles Kakes. Evah heard u r working @ a summer day camp. Beckers heard u r taking tickets @ Canadas Wonderland. Luis heard u r stocking shelves @ Canadian Tire. Ger heard u r pouring coffee @ the 2nd Cup. Shannon Lake heard from Justin that u r working on a farm in Manitoba. Im confused.
BTW, my dad still isnt home. My gran told my mom they dropped my dad off @ the airport on Tues. Just after they dropped my dad off they got a delivery it was flowers from the Mboro Credit Union xpressing their condolences on the death of Argo Anderson. Argos 1 of the goats.
I think my dads gone mental. Thanks Arne 4 telling me those stories about the floaters in the Niagara River I cldnt sleep last nite. My moms taking the day off work 2morrow 2 try 2 find my dad.
L8r.
p.s. Dont tell ne1 my dads missing cos my moms afraid hell get fired.
At 7:27 PM,
Anonymous said…
Lizardlips,
Is that better than Lizardbreath? You should give some thought to coming back to Milborough to preserve whatever lips you have left. I know whenever I see my daughter’s lips, I think more and more about the old house on Sharon Park Drive and how living someplace in Milborough close to the old house may be my daughter’s lips’ only salvation. I still call that place “home”, but I may someday also call it “lip-saver.” Think about it.
Love,
Michael Patterson
At 7:37 PM,
Anne said…
Lip-saver, like Chapstick?
Duncan's rite, these rumors spread fast. Maynard said he herd u found some "amazing" job in the States as a go-go dancer @ this "gentleman's club" n New Jersey, but Marjee told me she was pretty sure he was confuzed 7 thinking of this chick Apalonia who danced @ the Gig b4 it burned 2 the ground. As long as he gets the catalogs delivered, that's all that matters...lol.
Vicks
At 7:50 PM,
howard said…
April,
Oh, get off that September sock fantasy will you? I was talking about last Sunday when you wore a matching yellow shirt and socks. I can’t even mention socks without you bringing up those “butt-ugly socks you imagined wearing.” You didn’t mock Becky’s socks, did you? I don’t want to think of you as a sock-mocker, particularly when I made those socks for Becky and they seem to have produced a Latino-attracting side effect. Latinos are good kissers and you get good tongue action. Of course a trained opera professional can do both the trilled and uvular “r”s, in case in anyone is interested in some hot uvula action. Now that I think about it, Latinas are pretty good kissers too. I really enjoyed kissing Beatrice Alfarero a long time ago. But Latinas are not quite as aggressive as Latinos. I am beginning to feel a little jealous of Becky now. It’s been awhile since I have been with a Latino. I wonder if I should knit myself some socks.
Howard K.
At 7:58 PM,
April Patterson said…
i have heard all thoze job rumourz xcept the one abt me working in the st8s as a go-go dancer. vicks, i think u r rite abt maynard confusing me w/sum1 else.
i've also heard:
1. intern @ the toronto zoo, in the primate house
2. tax librarion @ zed's dad's firm
3. telemarketer selling "i've fallen an' i can't get up" devices
4. carriage driver @ milborough park
5. paper girl
6. tour guide @ the downtown milborough train museum
7. voice-over actor @ los bros hernandez animation studio
8. junior liz @ lakeshore landscaping
9. assistant greeter @ luxurion dept store
10. sous chef @ the eats diner
but y'know what? i'm still totally blanking on what my real planz r! this is freaking me out a lil bit!!!
apes
At 8:02 PM,
April Patterson said…
i'm sorry, howard, i totally didn't think of the yellow socks, cuz yellow doesn't seem that colourful 2 me!
i thot becky's socks were v. cute an' i told her so!!!
apes
At 8:14 PM,
Anonymous said…
april, az long az liz duzn’t eat her toque, she shud b fine. i dunno y she wud think u & gerald wudn’t be bf/gf. i wondah wut she thot wuz wrong w/him. i remembah now. it wuz wen ur mom told ur sis gerald wuz like anthony @ur birthday party 2 years ago. i can tell u that evn tho there r thingz i don’t like ‘bout gerald, i think he iz way bettah than anthony.
i think duncan may b a little mad cuz of hiz dad iz missin’ & didn’t show up 4 hiz trial. did u notice n hiz last post, he called eva, evah, like 2 make fun of how her name iz pronounced or 2 make fun of how her name iz n the band name? hiz dad iz missin’, so i think eva will not get 2 upset w/dunc, altho u may wanna reconsider that band name, if dunc iz gonna b jealous like that.
by the way, wen i heard u were gonna b bakin’ @krystle’s kakes & piez this summer, that wuz wen i overheard ur mom talking’ ‘bout ur summer planz. sumthin’ ‘bout how if ur not gonna go visit ur aunt bev n winnipeg & give ur ‘rents a welcome relief, u mite az well get a job w/sum charitable organization that wud benefit all of society. i thot she wuz gonna talk ‘bout buildin’ houses 4 the poor or like that, but then she sed krystle’s kakes & piez.
At 8:25 PM,
April Patterson said…
def, def better than anth!
dunc told me he mite start spelling eva as "evah" so ppl know how she pronounces it. lotsa peeps were getting confused abt that, i hear.
mike, u know what? i don't think the lips thing is abt leaving mboro. when i started that e-mail @ liz, i glanced in2 a lil mirror i have on my desk, and i noticed that my lips looked fuller, 2. by the time i'd finished e-mailing, tho, they were back 2 their usual selves. weird, eh?
apes
At 8:29 PM,
Anonymous said…
April,
You wrote me back!! Woooh!! ::beating imaginary drumsticks in the air::. Gerald told me this was the proper way to celebrate things and I should do it whenever I feel happy. I thought Gerald didn’t like me, but I guess I was wrong. I am also wrong about thinking you didn’t write back. My brother Blair is so protective sometimes. I should have guessed it was his safemail" mail filters. I should have known the nicest girl in Milborough would return my e-mail if she could. I told Blair it was all his fault and what a good friend you are and I beat my imaginary drumsticks in the air. Blair is mad at Gerald now, for some reason.
I asked Justin about your summer plans and he said that back in March, you were talking about going to work with your cousin Laura at a vet clinic and you were going to get to see pet surgeries. Justin is not wrong about things like that. Did you change your mind? I hope so. When we are out of school, there are a lot of activities I would like to do with you, if you have the time away from your work and your friends you hang out with and eat with at school.
Love,
Shannon Lake
At 8:39 PM,
April Patterson said…
shan, i'll answer yr question once my memory abt my summer planz gets unblocked. i'm not sure when that'll happ!
apes
At 8:41 PM,
Anonymous said…
april, lotsa peeps were gettin’ confuzed ‘bout eva b-ing pronounced like “evah”? who? peeps w/bad hearin’? wenevah i heard eva say her name n skool, i didn’t have ne problem. i guess u mean 4 the peeps who look @ur new band name & can’t figger out how it shud sound, not havin’ met eva b4. that wud make more sense. altho, i dunno y duncan wud do it on ur blog, where every1 knowz eva. xxcept mebbe ur bro & sis. iz it 4 them? this iz confuzin’. i like 2 put down peeps namez the way the want them. u know, becky likes rebeccah. eva likes eva. gerald likes gigli. just kiddin’ on that last 1.
At 8:45 PM,
Anonymous said…
April,
I am sorry your brain is not working right. That happens to me all the time. Just remember, it is way you are made, and it doesn't make you any better or worse than anyone else. It makes you special. That's what they tell me in my classes, and I think it must be true for you too.
Love,
Shannon Lake
At 9:00 PM,
howard said…
April,
I am sure that yellow doesn’t seem that colourful to you. There is no delicate way to say this, so I will have to be blunt. April, you and your family wear very bright colours almost all the time, and sometimes they are shockingly bright. I am sorry to have to say that, but it’s true. I can only think of a handful of times when I can remember you wearing anything muted or light-coloured. So, naturally when I gave Becky those baby blue socks, I was worried about your reaction. I am glad you thought they were cute. Please forgive my overreaction. I get very sensitive about my knitting. I think it dates back to the time in my youth when I knitted a wall length tapestry depicting the Canadian participation in the Battle of the Bulge, and all my dad could do was point out my historical inaccuracies.
I don’t what you have decided to do for the summer, but if it turns out your plans are not definite, then you could work with me at the Valhalla or Sugar’s hair salon. I think I could find you something to do that pays pretty well. I know both Sugar and Thorvald like you, so it wouldn’t be a problem.
Howard K.
At 9:05 PM,
April Patterson said…
jeremy, it was ppl who have only seen eva's name written down but not heard it sed aloud. not just mike an' liz, but paul, 2, an' also other ppl who mostly lurk here and sumtymez ask me questionz in e-mail or @ myspace.
shan, thanx 4 understanding!
howard, it's ok 2 b blunt like that. i know i have bad instincts when i comez 2 fashion. :(
apes
At 9:09 PM,
Anonymous said…
April,
Little sis. Think about what you are saying about your lips. You said when you start the e-mail to Lizardlips, that is going out of Milborough, your lips get bigger. But when you finish with that e-mail, your lips return to normal. Based on that, I would say it’s dangerous even to send e-mail out of Milborough. Who knows what repeated exposure to e-mail might do to you. That could work as a column – “Dangerous e-mail…Watch your lips” or maybe “Loose lips sink e-mail ships”. It needs work. I think I’ll make an outline of this idea and see what comes out of that.
Love,
Michael Patterson
At 9:14 PM,
howard said…
April,
No need to apologize. I know full-well what difficulties you have getting proper fashion which your mother will let you wear. By the way, tell your friend Duncan, I still have my "Ghost Who Walks" tattoo, and I could ask him to find Duncan's dad, if Duncan wants me too. Trust me, if anyone can find Duncan's dad, he can.
Howard K.
At 9:15 PM,
April Patterson said…
whatev the reason, i was kinda bummed when my lips went back 2 their usual shape. i liked the way they looked 4 a mo there!
apes
At 9:19 PM,
Anonymous said…
April,
I would do anything for you April. I don't know if I told you this lately, but I think you are the nicest girl in Milborough, and it doesn't even matter what size your lips are. If you came to school pushing them in a wheelbarrow tomorrow, I would still think you were nice. And I would open the door for your wheelbarrow too.
Love,
Shannon Lake
At 9:25 PM,
April Patterson said…
shan, i hope that doesn't happ w/my lips, but thanx, that's v. nice!
apes
At 9:27 PM,
Anonymous said…
april, eva just called me & asked if wunted 2 go w/her 2c x-men 3 @the almost midnite showin’ 2nite. wen we talked ‘bout it b4, she sed she didn’t wanna go cuz it wud b2 l8 wen we got back. but now she sez she changed her mind 4 sum reazn, but wen i asked her y, i cud tell she wuz smirkin’ ovah the fone. i just luv it wen eva smirks. did u & ger wanna go w/us? i know it’s last minute, but it shud be fun.
At 9:47 PM,
Anonymous said…
April,
Little sis. Those big lips may make you look like a European sylphan nymph, but there is a price to be paid with your ability to talk. You can tell it the most with my daughter. She used to talk like a little girl and now when I hear her talking she sounds like an adult. I am convinced it’s the lips distorting the sound. Then a lot of times when Deanna talks to me, I can’t really understand what she is saying. Sometimes, I swear it sounds to me like she is telling me to quit my job working at Portrait Magazine and try to live off my freelance work. I have learned that when I can’t understand Deanna like that, I just say, “I’m fine. Honest. We need the extra money.” That usually works. I don’t like the work at Portrait very much anymore, but when you have kids, you have to worry about paying the bills. But I digress. The point is, having big lips is not necessarily something to envy. I don't have them, and I look pretty good.
Love,
Michael Patterson
At 9:47 PM,
April Patterson said…
i shdn't, so i will! ger sez the same thing!
apes
At 9:51 PM,
Anonymous said…
april, all rite!! i am gonna get tix n advance on the computer & my mom will pick u & gerald up & drive us ovah enuf b4 the show starts so we can get seats 2gethah.
At 10:01 PM,
April Patterson said…
cube, we'll b ready!
apes
At 10:27 PM,
howard said…
April,
I had to do both shows at the Valhalla again tonight. Arne the magician has not shown up since he left last Thursday for an International Association of Illusionists convention. I told Thorvald he probably wouldn’t be back, but Thorvald has not decided to fire him. He said, “The old folks love him and his disappearing lice trick.” So, while Arne is away, Howard must play. I suppose I shouldn’t complain. While being extremely poorly written and an affront to almost all my artistic senses, Thorvald’s opera, “The Dentist and the Teenagers” has been well-received at each and every performance.
The plusses however are that I have not had to undress, except to take off my white dental lab coat. I also have not had to wear nearly as much makeup as when I wore full body makeup in my previous act. This is good because I was starting to break out in places where a man simply should not be breaking out. Becky noticed it the other night when I was bathing her, and it was quite embarrassing, if you know what I mean. But a dermatological test and few other tests for sexually transmitted diseases proved that it was just a reaction to wearing all that makeup. That was quite a relief. When you have my history, you worry about those things. My sperm count was still good too, if you are interesting in hearing about it, but I guess you probably aren’t.
This is going to sound odd, but Taylor Morgan came by the Valhalla looking for Becky. Apparently he wanted to take her to the midnight showing of X-Men 3. I suspected that Becky may be off somewhere studying with her new Latin lover, Luis. I didn’t know for sure at the time, so I covered for her as best I could. I told Taylor that she was probably home getting her beauty rest after a difficult day of studying and should not be disturbed. Hopefully that worked. I am trying not to be jealous of Becky and Luis, but the thought of a Latino gets my blood going. Oh well, no time for those kind of thoughts. The lab coat needs to go back on for another round of singing and being pelted by dinner rolls.
Howard K.
At 11:23 PM,
Anonymous said…
rebeccah, eva & i & april & gerald got 2 the megaplex 4 x-men 3. wen we got there, we saw duncan & zandra & i guess it is zandra’z little bro. i sed 2 eva, “i didn’t know duncan liked the x-men?” eva sed, “it’s prolly cuz they wear mostly black. prolly appealz 2 duncan’z gf.” i sed, “w8. did u know they wud b here?” eva just smirked @me. i can’t be mad @eva wen she smirks.
gerald wuz like runnin’ ovah 2 duncan & he wunted us all 2 sit togethah. i guess he wuzn’t lookin’ 4ward 2 havin’ 2 talk 2 me all nite, since we have had problemz b4. if looks cud kill, zandra wud’ve murdered gerald n cold blood rite there. so we found seats 2gethah & gerald makes this big deal ‘bout how eva iz amazin’ cuz she iz the lead singer n 4evah & eva & he makes sure she sits n the best seat n the middle rite next 2 duncan. so i am next 2 eva on her othah side and zandra iz next 2 duncan on her othah side & april iz talkin’ ovah me 2 eva & i can tell duncan iz tryin’ rilly hard not 2 look @eva’z chest cuz, well eva haz a rilly nice-lookin’ chest, evn wen she izn’t tryin’ 2 show it off. @the same tyme duncan iz tryin’ 2 talk 2 zandra & her bro. i think duncan iz rilly reddy 4 the movie 2 start. zandra’z bro iz like askin’ duncan all this x-men trivia & it iz rilly obscure stuff, like “is sabretooth rilly wolverine’s son?”, & stuff like that. i think i am rilly reddy 4 the movie 2 start 2.
At 12:48 AM,
Anonymous said…
i hadda get up 2 go 2 the washroom during the movie previews cuz sum1 spilled their drink on me. wen i got back, i tried 2 make it back 2 my same seat, but the peeps had moved around on me. gerald sed, “april wunted 2 sit by eva, cuz she wuz gettin’ tired of talkin’ ovah u. so i gotta seat sumwhere. it wuz dark & i guess it didn’t mattah where april wuz sittin’ az long az i wuz sittin’ by eva. then this rilly weird thing happed & i dunno how 2 xxplain it. i felt eva grabbin’ my hand n the scary part wen the mutants were gettin’ beat up. it thot it wuz rilly gr8 2b holdin’ her hand, cuz thass kinda wut i wunted 2 do. then i felt eva’z hand reach around the back of my neck & she kissed me hard. she sed, “ur nice.” then i ‘bout freaked out, cuz it wuz then i realized it wuzn’t eva @all. i looked ‘round & i finally realized where eva wuz & it wuzn’t by me. 4tun8ly i don’t think she noticed & i don’t think ne1 else noticed either, cuz they were n2 the movie. then i thot i mita been imaginin’ it. but the girl sittin’ next 2 me grinned @me, so i know it wuz 4 real. i think i am gonna just watch the movie & hope it duzn’t happ again.
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