April's Real Blog

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

Being Practical

Sum1 around here hasta B practical, eh? Sunday, while Dad & I were out walking, & I'd sed that thing abt him & Mom being moody, Dad was all, "U think yr Mom & I have been 'moody'?" & I was like, "Yeah!! U're so...unsettled! Mom's gonna sell the store, U want 2 retire--but U don't seem 2 have a plan 4 what happens next! What R U going 2 do w/the rest of yr lives?" Dad was like "I dunno, April. I guess we'll just have 2 find out!" & I sed, "If U don't mind a little advice, Pop....Ppl yr age shd B approaching the future with more practicality." & Dad had that "D'oh" look on his face all over again. Dude, U've gotta acquire more facial expressions! So, NEway, it had 2 B sed. & partly I sed it 2 remind them they haven't, like, finished raising me yet, & we still need 2 plan our future, eh?

2day's Valentine's Day, peeps! Vicks, I got the gift U told me abt, the 1 my Dad dropped off in the office, but I haven't gotten a chance 2 open it yet. I'll post after I do. & Dunc, I'll post the Kimmi poem when I remember where I saved it! This evening'z the big Valentine's concert w/Jeremy's Dad. Jeremy got a whole buncha peeps fr. school comp tix: all the grade-11 "Paris Hilton" blonde A-girls, the goth Z-girls, the grade-9 blonde wanna-B A-girls, & also his friendz! So, Ger & I R going, & so R Eva, Dunc, Vicks & Gordie, & of course Becks & Jeremy.

B4 the concert, Ger & I R having an early romantic dinner @ La Crème de la Crème de Milborough. 5:30 pm. After the hockey game against I C Gens Morts Secondary School.

Well, gotta go!

Apes

Labels: , ,

posted by April Patterson @ 10:15 AM  

33 Comments:

  • At 12:09 PM, Blogger howard said…

    April,

    La Crème de la Crème de Milborough is pretty nice for Gerald to pick up. Be sure to say hello to Chef Sofia if you see her. As for me, I will spending Valentine’s Day evening with Dr. McCauley and Krystle McGuire. Krystle approached me this morning at breakfast and said, “Mrs. Batsize (my old lady alter ego name), would you be so kind as to make a Valentine’s Day dinner for me and Ted at home? I know how much Ted likes your cooking.” Dr. McCauley said, “Krystle, I told you I need to work cleaning up mom’s old house tonight.” Krystle said, “Ted. It’s Valentine’s Day and I want you to be with me tonight and not working in that dusty old house. Don’t you like your mom’s food?” Dr. McCauley said, “Mom is a great cook. I thought you would be busy at your store this evening.” Krystle said, “I’ve made other arrangements. Your mom wants you to stay home to have her special Valentine’s Day food, she is making just for you, right mom?” I said, “Certainly, ma’am. If you would like a dinner in tonight, I can handle that.” Krystle said, “You see, Ted. You don’t want to disappoint mother, do you?” Dr. McCauley said, “Oh, all right. I’ll be here.” Krystle said, “Thank you, Ted. Your mother is very happy now, isn’t that right, mom?” I said, “Yes, ma’am. Very happy.”

    After Dr. McCauley had left, Krystle came up to me and said, “Make it a long dinner with lots of courses, Howard. I don’t want Ted to have time to be with anyone else but me tonight.” I said, “Certainly, ma’am.” Then she said, “Thanks for going along with it. You’re a sweetie.” And she grabbed my head and stuck a tongue down my throat, just as Dr. McCauley came back into the room for work. He said, “Mom! Krystle!” Krystle said, “You know, Ted. I just love your mother. Happy Valentine’s Day! Be sure to give your mom a kiss for Valentine’s Day.” Then Dr. McCauley did the same thing as Krystle. When Becky came for her breakfast, I told her the story and she was grossed out. She said, “Howard. I am eating!”

    I used a lot of mouthwash this morning.

    Howard K.

     

  • At 12:35 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    april, i read ur blog & thot it wud b gud 2 talk 2 my mom ‘bout her retirements planz. she sed, “az u know jeremy, ur future dad & i r plannin’ 2 marry, but sperm washers don’t make az much money az private practice drs like ur friend april’z dad. plus, he haz a magick touch 4 investments. he invested n gordon maye’z bizness & lakeshore landscapin’ wen they were just startin’ out, & they have both done rilly well. the reazn he can play ‘round w/wen he retirez iz cuz he haz so much money he can retire netyme he wunts. i asked him 1 tyme y he wuz so lucky w/investments & he sed, ‘alwayz put ur money n2 biznesses started by oppressed minoritiez & peeps who were physically abused az children. thoze r the most successful biznesses n m-boro.’ that caused me to take a luk ‘round m-boro & he wuz rite. there’z mr. singh’z grocery, the swedish furniture place, and others. the biznesses run by othah kindz of peeps failed. neway, ur future dad & i r planning 2 work till we r 65 & we have university fundz 4u & 4 ur future sis. don’t worry.”

    so, april, u don’t needta worry ‘bout money. if my mom iz rite, u got plenty.

     

  • At 3:46 PM, Blogger April Patterson said…

    d00d, becks, yr mom is just as bad as ger's dad w/making the assumptions abt me just cuz i'm a patterson. mayB she'll b rite abt mike & liz, but she does NOT have me figged out! i'm not gonna live in mboro, i'm not gonna b a housewife, & no way am i gonna b fat!!!

    jeremy, i hope u r rite abt my 'rents & $, but they do make me nervous.

    ger sez he's got a surprise planned 4 me 4 after the concert.

    apes

     

  • At 4:13 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    April,

    Boozhoo (Hello).

    I have just arrived at your sister’s apartment in Mtigwaki (Land of Trees). I picked up my cousin, the animal shaman. I took in my 2 cakes (1 for your sister and 1 for Shiimsa). Your sister greeted us at the door and said, “Who is this?” I said, “It is my cousin, the animal shaman.” Your sister said, “Boozhoo (Hello).” My cousin said, “I can’t wait to meet your gaazhagens (cat). Paul has told me about her.” Your sister said, “Oh Paul. I can’t wait to show you Shiimsa’s valentine for you. It was her own idea, and I think it is very sweet.” My cousin said, “Maji-manidoo!” Your sister said, “What?” My cousin said, “I have never seen a gaazhagens (cat) like that.” Your sister said, “I know. Isn’t she special? What do you think?” I said, “I love it. Shiimsa is such an original thinker. It is a beautiful valentine.” Your sister said, “I am so glad you like it.” I said, “Here is the cake I told you about. One for you and one for Shiimsa.” We sliced up some cake and Shiimsa tore into her tuna cake. My cousin said, “I never knew you could bake, Paul.” I said, “It was an idea I got from Elizabeth’s sister April. She baked a cake for her nimishoomis (grandfather).” My cousin said, “Whenever you are ready, we can start.” I said, “I’m ready.” Your sister said she was ready for some family counseling. Shiimsa looked very contented and full of tuna. I will write you how it goes after we are done.

    Gi'-ga-wa-ba-min' na-gutch! (See you later!)
    Constable Paul Wright

     

  • At 4:19 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    rebeccah, sperm washers do the collecting of deposits @a sperm bank. so, my mom izn’t gonna b makin’ ne superbabiez. ur just kiddin’, rite?

     

  • At 4:33 PM, Blogger howard said…

    April,

    Since we have had all this discussion about your parents’ future plans, I should mention that I did run into your mother as I was leaving work today, and I thought I would ask her. So I did. She said, “Our financial planner is a lovely young man who reminds me a lot of John when he was his age. He is excellent. He thinks of things John and I would never have thought of for handling our money.” I said, “Like what?” Your mother said, “For example, I had always thought the idea of having a dowry to induce a man to marry a woman was old-fashioned until Anthony convinced me otherwise. Our daughter is practically an old maid, but if she ever gets a suitor who is sitting on the fence over proposing, we will casually mention the dowry, and it will put the deal over.” I said, “You’re talking about Elizabeth?” Your mother said, “Who else?” I said, “Well, your other daughter is obviously too young to be thinking about marriage.” Elly said, “My other daughter?” I said, “April.” Your mother said, “Oh my god! How could I have forgotten? No wonder April was so concerned about John’s and my plans for the future. We don’t have a dowry set up for her. Excuse, I need to contact Anthony about this.” Then she turned around and left.

    I thought you might be interested in that conversation.

    Howard K.

     

  • At 4:56 PM, Blogger April Patterson said…

    omg, so mom's a st00pid fool & anthony's a crook. big surprise.

    i've gotta look in2 scholarships!

    apes

     

  • At 6:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    April,

    Boozhoo (Hello).

    My cousin started by having us all sit in a circle. He lit a small piece of tobacco. He said, “I am inviting the Gichi-manidoo (Great Spirit) to help us commune together. I sat beside your sister and Shiimsa was sitting very comfortably in my lap. The Gichi-manidoo (Great Spirit) wants us to be in harmony with each other. Let’s all say something nice about each other. I said, “I like Shiimsa’s purring. It is very soothing. Elizabeth looks beautiful.” Your sister said, “I love Shiimsa’s new colour. Paul is handsome.” Shiimsa said, “Mee-rowr.” Your sister said, “No, Shiimsa. We are supposed to say something nice.” My cousin said, “You can understand her meows?” Your sister said, “Can’t you? You’re the animal shaman.” My cousin said, “Of course. I am surprised you can understand them. Most animals and their owners are not so well in tune.” I said, “I told you that Elizabeth and Shiimsa had a special connection.” My cousin said, “You were right, I mean correct, sorry.”

    He continued, “Now there is harmony in the room. We are ready to share our grievances.” Shiimsa said, “Mrorwr. Meee-rwr. Mrerowr.” Your sister said, “Shiimsa! I didn’t realize.” I said, “What did Shiimsa say?” My cousin said, “Shiimsa hates that spray bottle with water that Elizabeth uses for correction, particularly when Jesse Mukwa gets his hands on it.” I said, “You could understand that?” My cousin said, “Yes. I am an animal shaman after all. Elizabeth what do you have to say to Shiimsa about the spray bottle?” Your sister said, “I only use the bottle to train Shiimsa not to scratch the furniture. I could stop using the bottle if Shiimsa agreed to stop scratching where she shouldn’t.” My cousin said, “Shiimsa. What do you have to say to Elizabeth about her offer?” Shiimsa said, “Meerowr. Fft. Fft. Mrorwr.” My cousin said, “Angra Mainyu makes no deals?” Your sister said, “Oh that is a little joke that Shiimsa and I like to do.” My cousin said, “What is Angra Mainyu? It does not sound like Ojibway?” Your sister said, “It means ‘source of all evil and darkness.’ Doesn’t Shiimsa have a good sense of humour?” I said to my cousin, “It would be ondaadadit maji-izhiwebizihe bishagiishkaandeit in Ojibway. You see Shiimsa’s sense of humour is just like I told you.” My cousin said to your sister, “Your gaazhagens(cat) is maji-manidoowaadizihe (stubborn.) I must remove the Maji-manidoo (stubbornness) from her.” Your sister said, “It’s not going to hurt Shiimsa, is it?” My cousin said, “It will make Shiimsa feel much better.” Then he blew some smoke on Shiimsa (who coughed a little) and said, “Gichi-manidoo (Great Spirit) gida'an (remove) Maji-manidoo (stubbornness) from this gaazhagens(cat)” while he was groaning. After he was done, he said, “Now Shiimsa should be much more agreeable. Shiimsa, do agree to not scratch the furniture?” Shiimsa said, “Mrowr.” Your sister said, “I can’t believe it. She agreed. Oh animal shaman, this is wonderful.” My cousin said, “I know. Miigwech (Thank you). Shiimsa, do you have any more grievances?” Shiimsa said, “Mrowr.” Your sister said, “No grievances? But what about when I put bad tasting spray on the plants to keep you from eating them?” Shiimsa said, “Mrowr.” Your sister said, “What about when I push you away when I type on my computer keyboard to Paul?” Shiimsa said, “Mrowr.” Your sister said, “What about when I want you to ride in the cat carrier to go to Milborough to spend time with Dixie and Eddy?” Shiimsa said, “Mrowr.” Your sister said, “It is unbelievable. Oh animal shaman, this is fantastic. Paul, bringing your cousin over was the best Valentine’s gift ever.” I said, “I am glad it worked.” My cousin said, “I am too. I have never seen it work this well before.” I walked my cousin home. It looks like it is going to be a great Valentine’s Day.

    Gi'-ga-wa-ba-min' na-gutch! (See you later!)
    Constable Paul Wright

     

  • At 6:08 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    april, u know if u can get that dowry n ur name, it cud b the same thing az a scholarship. just a thot. rebeccah & i r @dinner. we will meet u @my dad'z concert, eh?

     

  • At 6:13 PM, Blogger howard said…

    April,

    I hope you have a good time at the concert with Becky and all those other people you know. I think Jeremy picked up Becky from her mother's bakery. Krystle (Becky's mom) has been hovering over me while I am cooking to make sure that I serve a lot of courses. She keeps calling Dr. McCauley's office to make sure that he is coming here instead of wandering elsewhere. It's making me tense. I may have to lift some weights after I finish serving.

    Have a good time. I hope you get lots of good Valentine's Day gifts.

    Howard K.

     

  • At 6:20 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    WHY DO YOU NOT TELL THEM WHAT YOUR SPECIAL VALENTINE LOOKED LIKE, MOUNTIE? AND WHY DO YOU NOT TELL THEM THE TRUTH--

    THAT IT MADE YOU FEEL...

    AFRAID!!!

    YOU THOUGHT I WAS GONE...BUT IT WILL TAKE MORE THAN YOUR WEAK MEDICINE MAN TO BANISH ME!

    ANGRA MAINYU

     

  • At 6:24 PM, Blogger April Patterson said…

    ger & i have been enjoying a marvy-licious dinner @ la crème de la crème de milborough. chef sophia is v. cube. we r abt 2 have dessert.

    liz, omg, what's going on w/shiimsa! scary, scary!

    jeremy u mite b rite abt getting that "dowry" in my name 2 use as i want.

    apes

     

  • At 6:26 PM, Blogger April Patterson said…

    ger, there won't b more 2 love cuz i'm not getting fat. my mom's fat cuz she scarfs pastriez enuf 2 feed a village & gets no xercise. not gonna b like that!

    apes

     

  • At 6:37 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Dearest April flower,

    Mater says that Liz is already starting to look a little hefty. And in many pictures in the photo album on your family website, she is eating something. Mater says you will start to be like this too, when you start college. Actually, Mater's exact words were, "Freshman 15? That girl will be looking at the Freshman 50, mark my words!"

    You shouldn't worry, though. I have booked the church and reception hall for the weekend after high school grad, so you will still be thin for your wedding photos! I understand that is important to women.

    Devotedly yours, Gerald

     

  • At 6:53 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    gerald, considerin' wut ur sayin' 2 april 'bout her figure, ur lucky if xxplodin' clownz r not n ur future.

    rebeccah & i r @the concert hall. u guyz needta get here soon. it's crowded & it takes awhile 2 get n. vicki, gordie, duncan, & eva r allreddy here. gordie brot hiz freakin’ skateboard w/him. i swear the guy haz 2b on some sorta movin’ object all the tyme. vicki sed she met him sk8in’, so i guess he woulda appeared more normal there. the grade 9 a-girlz (avery, alanis, & anais) all came by 2c where eva wuz sittin’. rebeccah got kinda mad @sumthin’ avery sed 2 her, i dunno wut & she wudn’t tell me. eva haz been talkin’ nonstop on her cell 2 them evah since they went 2 their seatz. she bettah have that phone off during the concert. the z-girls (zoe, zelda, zabra, & zahara) were askin’ where april wuz, wen they stopped by.

    i wish i cud say the othah a-girlz & z-girlz i got comps 4 have come by 2 say thanx, but they haven’t. i can hear them frum where i am sitting. i know wut april meanz when that constant yakkin’ gets on her nerves.

    hurry up & get here!

     

  • At 6:54 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    April,

    Shiimsa's little jokes are so funny! Don't they make you laugh? She's my scary little dumpling!

    Liz

     

  • At 7:06 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    April,

    Boozhoo (Hello).

    Your sister said I should write to you about what my special Valentine from Shiimsa looked like and she called me Mountie, with an evil look on her face. In the past, when your sister had that look on her face and called me Mountie (I am actually in the Ontario Provincial Police, and not a Mountie), it meant things were going to go well for me. Your sister said she wrote you a special message about how things were going to go this evening she did not want me to read, or it would spoil the surprise. I can hardly wait.

    Shiimsa’s special Valentine is that, at Shiimsa's request, your sister dyed Shiimsa's fur bright red with Kool-Aid. Also, Shiimsa is wearing a white lace collar, so she resembles a Valentine. So, Shiimsa is actually the Valentine. Since my cousin, the animal shaman was here, I feel more comfortable seeing it that way, instead of looking at Shiimsa as a something else not as comfortable.

    The way your sister is looking at me, I have the feeling this may be my last writing to you this evening. Happy Valentine’s Day.

    Gi'-ga-wa-ba-min' na-gutch! (See you later!)
    Constable Paul Wright

     

  • At 7:08 PM, Blogger howard said…

    April,

    A freaking 25-course meal. That is what I am serving to Dr. McCauley and Becky’s mom. A freaking 25-course meal. This may be my last post to you for awhile.

    Howard K.

     

  • At 7:14 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    april, where ru? the concert haz started. i hadda take eva'z cell away frum her. she iz sittin' on the xxact opposite side of us az far away frum duncan az she can b. she duzn't luk happy, like she iz undergoin' withdrawal symptomz. i also hadda take gordie's sk8board away frum him. he duzn't luk happy, like he iz undergoin' withdrawal symptomz. rebeccah iz sittin' by me. she smellz gud.

     

  • At 8:01 PM, Blogger April Patterson said…

    hey, liz, ger & i were just crossing the floor over 2 jeremy as he was posting that last message. i dunno what 2 say abt those shiimsa "jokes".

    jeremy's rite abt my not liking what ger's saying abt my figure. it's like he won't believe what i tell him, which is insulting. we talked abt that sum on the way here, but i don't wanna spoil our special evening.

    apes

     

  • At 8:36 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    This concert is interesting.

    Ava (aka Eva)

     

  • At 9:06 PM, Blogger April Patterson said…

    i found the poem i helped dunc write 4 kimmi. i'll copy & paste it here since dunc asked. the parts in italics r part of the alma mater 4 kimmi's catholic military reform school, cuz she told dunc putting in bits from the school song makes the nuns less likely 2 censor, or @ least mayB not censor as much.

    oh, hail mary & the military,
    with our praise of saints & guns we won't b chary.
    kimmi lasalle, u r very cube
    & i'm so glad u're not a foob

    prayer & discipline r the way 2 go,
    our anti-social behaviour is our biggest foe
    kimmi, i miss u so much
    hangin' @ horny t's & such

    happy valentine's day 2 u fr me
    yr rappin', hip-hop MCDunC

    & then dunc added:

    i miss u every day that i live
    & when i think of u i think roy g. biv

     

  • At 9:11 PM, Blogger duncan anderson said…

    Thats such a gr8 poem, Apes, u r much better than that Shakespeare d00d. I hope Kimmi got it ok. I think the Sister wld of given it 2 Kimmi aft reading Howies poem 2 the Sister. 2 bad Howies 2 shy 2 post his poem but it was a rilly rilly cube poem.

     

  • At 9:17 PM, Blogger April Patterson said…

    wow, jeremy's dad. we're backstage & all i can say is jeremy is way, way nicer than his dad!

    apes

     

  • At 9:19 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Yeah, Jeremy, your dad's interesting. In that other way. His sense of humour isn't what I'm used to.

    I'm gonna call Anais & ask her what she thinks.

    Ava (Eva)

     

  • At 9:29 PM, Blogger April Patterson said…

    hm, jeremy's dad just sed jeremy's skillz w/a sound board r just like yr typical woman'z driving skillz. jeremy looked really upset & i sed mayB his dad thinx women r v. good drivers. & jeremy told me that his dad believes women shdn't b allowed 2 get licenced 2 drive @ all! d00dz!

    when jeremy introduced me & ger 2 him & sed that ger & i r a couple? jeremy's dad looked me up & down & told ger "u can do better". then he actually told becks, "u can do better 2". he'z way harsh!

    then he told gordie "u look stupid" & gordie was, like, "thanks"! vicks was like speechless.

    & he was all "eva? ava? make up yr damn-fool mind, birdbrain!" like i sed, harsh!

    apes

     

  • At 9:31 PM, Blogger April Patterson said…

    aw, man, now he'z telling dunc that rap is st00pid & he shd find sumthin' practical 2 fall back on, like subjecting himself 2 medical tests! this guy'z just mean, man!

    apes

     

  • At 9:49 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Dearest April flower,

    All I am saying is, no matter what you look like, I will still love you and think you are the most beautiful little April flower on the planet.

    Happy Valentine's Day!

    Your future husband, Gerald

     

  • At 9:50 PM, Blogger April Patterson said…

    becks, was i hearing things, or did jeremy's dad just say yr freckles r fake? what a bizarro thing 2 say!

    ger, that's v. sweet.

    apes

     

  • At 9:52 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Such an interesting comment about my hair, which is so not a weave! Thanks for punching him, Becky!

    Ava (aka Eva)

     

  • At 10:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Jeremy, your father heard me call April "my future wife" and he looked at me and said,

    "Son, life ain't about marriage and kids. Real life is about wine, women and song. Real life is about waking up in a strange motel room, with two strange women, and not knowing what town you're in, or even what month it is, but knowing you must've had a good time last night, even if you can't remember it. Real life is about getting down on your hands and knees at the free clinic and praying you don't got something fatal, and then, while you're down there, throwing up in the wastebasket because you drank a quart of Wild Turkey on the way over and you might as well kill two birds with one stone. Real life is about making your woman take a paternity test even though you're pretty sure the bastard's yours, just on the off chance that you can duck an order for child support. Real life is about skipping town and changing your name just as the constable comes to serve that child support order. Hell, son, real life is cleaning out your liquor cabinet the old-fashioned way, then trying to convince your woman to just get rid of it, 'cause let's face it, better $300 this month then $300 every month for the next 18 years. And don't even get me started about money. Real life is giving your baby mama $300 and having her tell you that won't even get her through the week, let alone the month. Real life is when your baby mama sends her brothers to enforce the child support order by beating a copper pipe on your kidneys. Real life is pawning your sound equipment for just enough oxycontin to get you through the week. Real life is about..."

    Then I broke in and said, "Well, Mr. Jones, it sounds to me like you never let the love of a good woman touch your soul. That's really very sad."

    Suddenly April is not so angry with me anymore.

    Sincerely, Gerald

     

  • At 1:05 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    april, well dad wuz not 2 bad 2nite, compared 2 how i have seen him. i think he wuz tryin’ 2 make a gud mpression. lemme run thru the apologiez i normally hafta do wen i ntroduce peeps 2 him:

    april: sorry he sed ger cud do bettah than u & made that comment ‘bout ur hair b-ing outa style. i wuz rilly sorry wen he sed i coulda tried 2 run down on a bicycle a bettah-lookin’ girl.
    gerald: sorry he nsulted ur choice of gf & gave u that lecture on real life. thass 1 of hiz favrites. pleaze don’t use the card 4 the divorce lawyer he gave u.
    rebeccah: sorry he called u a lesbos & sed ur freckles were fake. also, u don’t luk slutty @all.
    gordie: sorry he sed u luk st00pid & he made u stop ridin’ ur sk8board on the stage.
    vicki: sorry he asked u if wut he heard ‘bout native girlz iz true.
    ava (eva): sorry he insulted ur choice of namez & ur hair and ur hair clip.
    duncan: sorry he insulted ur musick & suggested medical testin’ az a career. i thot the comments he made ‘bout how u didn’t luk like u were frum barbados were outa line.

    aftah we left the backstage, i tuk rebeccah 2 my romantic surprise 4 the evening. i thot i wud let u know wut it wuz. it wuz a ride on a horse-drawn sleigh ‘round the milborough park. i gave rebeccah sum jewelry, roses, & chocolates. i thot she wuz happy w/it till she sed, “wut ‘bout the blindfoldz?” i had completely forgotten she wunted me 2 get her sum blindfoldz. she sed she wuz kiddin’ but i wuzn’t sure till she delivered sum of thoze bennies that comes frum b-ing friendz w/bennies. overall, the nite went pretty gud. the concert wuz gud, dad b-haved himself pretty well, & the horse-drawn sleigh wuz fun.

     

  • At 1:35 AM, Blogger howard said…

    April,

    25 freakin’ courses. Becky got home just as I was getting to course #25. Dr. McCauley said, “Is the last one, mom?” I said, “Certainly, sir. I hope there is no reason for any more?” Becky’s mom Krystle said, “Are you going to your mom’s old place tonight to clean up, Ted?” Dr. McCauley said, “I’m going to need help just getting to bed. I am so full.” Krystle said, “Then I guess that is the last course.” Becky said, “Is there any left?” I said, “Yes, young miss. I have 25 courses of leftovers.” Becky and I helped Dr. McCauley and Krystle get to bed. Then I served Becky some leftovers. I asked her how her date went. Becky said, “The concert was good for country-western, but I am really glad that Jeremy is not anything like his dad.” Becky mentioned that Duncan was still asking about that poem. Well, I finally dug it out of the trash. It goes like this:

    K is for the Kerygma she professes
    I is for the Intercession she seeks from above
    M is for the Mass she messes.
    M is for Mary, Mother of God she loves
    I is for the Immaculate Conception she stresses.
    Put them all together and you get a holy dove

    K-I-M-M-I,
    She drives me crazy with her chastity
    K-I-M-M-I
    She knows I adore her with her poverty.
    K-I-M-M-I
    She makes want to follow her obediently.
    K-I-M-M-I
    I think of her so St. Valentine's Day-ly.

    Howard K.

     

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