Great Ppl in Mtig
Liz told me she was feeling 2 "emotionally fragile" 2 tell U the next bit of what happed during her Mtig visit, and she asked me 2 do it. She was, all, walking along outside w/Gary Crane as the huge, elliptical snowflakes hovered all around them. Gary was saying, "We've been 2 the community center, the band hall, the nursing station, the coffee shop and the school." And Liz was like, "I guess I've seen every1 I came 2 C." Gary asked, "And what about Paul. Have U nothing else 2 say 2 him?"
Liz sez she was upset w/Gary 4 saying that, cuz she really wasn't planning on seeing or speaking 2 Paul ever again, but was ready 2 bury the whole thing in her mind as soon as poss. But since she felt like he was putting her up 2 it, she went 2 Susan's apt and knocked on the door. As she did, the door actually said, "KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK," and from inside, Susan sed, "Coming!" This time, both Paul and Susan came to the door. Susan was sort of leaning in2 Paul and she was clutching one of his arms, like she was afraid Liz wd punch her or sumthin'. And Paul looked all startled. Liz sez that Paul was, like, "Elizabeth, we don't want 2 fite, OK?" And Liz sed, "I didn't come 2 fite. I came 2 say goodbye." Then she started 2 walk away while saying, "And Paul... Even tho it didn't work out for us, I want U 2 know that if U ever need a friend...." And she w8ed until she was, like, @ the end of the walkway B4 finishing that sentence: "There R sum gr8 ppl here in Mtigwaki."
Which, I don't know if she was B-ing all sarcastic abt the "gr8 ppl." Cuz she was mad@ them 4 not warning her abt Paul an' Susan. But she still insists they're "noble" up there whenev the subject comes up. And another thing is I'm kinda surprised Liz never sat with Paul (like in an interior setting) and had a convo abt what-all happed, instead of sum quickie words xxchanged outside Susan's door. U know, like what went wrong w/them, when it did, all that. I know Liz is hurt an' all, and I totally understand that, but I think I'd wanna know.
Apes
Liz sez she was upset w/Gary 4 saying that, cuz she really wasn't planning on seeing or speaking 2 Paul ever again, but was ready 2 bury the whole thing in her mind as soon as poss. But since she felt like he was putting her up 2 it, she went 2 Susan's apt and knocked on the door. As she did, the door actually said, "KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK," and from inside, Susan sed, "Coming!" This time, both Paul and Susan came to the door. Susan was sort of leaning in2 Paul and she was clutching one of his arms, like she was afraid Liz wd punch her or sumthin'. And Paul looked all startled. Liz sez that Paul was, like, "Elizabeth, we don't want 2 fite, OK?" And Liz sed, "I didn't come 2 fite. I came 2 say goodbye." Then she started 2 walk away while saying, "And Paul... Even tho it didn't work out for us, I want U 2 know that if U ever need a friend...." And she w8ed until she was, like, @ the end of the walkway B4 finishing that sentence: "There R sum gr8 ppl here in Mtigwaki."
Which, I don't know if she was B-ing all sarcastic abt the "gr8 ppl." Cuz she was mad@ them 4 not warning her abt Paul an' Susan. But she still insists they're "noble" up there whenev the subject comes up. And another thing is I'm kinda surprised Liz never sat with Paul (like in an interior setting) and had a convo abt what-all happed, instead of sum quickie words xxchanged outside Susan's door. U know, like what went wrong w/them, when it did, all that. I know Liz is hurt an' all, and I totally understand that, but I think I'd wanna know.
Apes
posted by April Patterson @ 6:41 AM
4 Comments:
At 11:48 AM,
Anonymous said…
April,
It's not that I was too "emotionally fragile," or whatever that means, that is Candace kind of talk, no, what I said was, "I can't talk now, I'm going to bed because of my emotions," which what I meant was, I needed to get some sleep so I don't get depressed, Candace and Mom say it is really common to get depressed when you get cheated on and dumped by the man you thought you were maybe going to marry, and you know me, I am a "get it done" kind of person so I just went straight to bed last night, also, I was feeling kind of tired.
Anyway, when I went over to Paul's house the reason he might of thought I wanted to fight was that I had Viv's cast iron skillet hidden under my winter coat, which magically changed colors while I was in Mtigwaki by the way, it was really incredible, one day it was blue with tan fur trim, and then it was a tan coat with white trim, but anyway, Susan saw the outline of the frying pan under my coat and she kind of cowered behind Paul and said, "Look out! Frying pan!" and Paul said, "Elizabeth, we don't want to fight, okay?" which disappointed me a lot because if the person you are going to smack with a frying pan says "I don't want to fight!" before you start, then technically all you are allowed to use on them is a small saucepan, and I didn't have one of those with me, so I totally had to lie and say, "I didn't come to fight, I came to say goodbye," to save face.
Well, I was super annoyed because Paul and Susan were still cuddling, so I decided to to the MEANEST THING EVER IN THE HISTORY OF CANADA to them!
1) I said to Paul that if he ever needed a friend, there are some great people in Mtigwaki that he can count on...but he can't count on me, because WE'RE NOT FRIENDS ANYMORE!!! He lost his Patterson friendship FOREVER!!!
2) I totally ignored that whore slut Susan, which means she is not even worthy of Patterson notice, which is like being a total outcast in the important part of Canada, which is the south part of Ontario.
I know you are probably thinking this is a really cruel punishment but I think they deserve it, remember Eric got this punishment too and even though his life is not totally horrible since he has a good job, you will notice that he is not married and doesn't have kids, which is a pretty terrible fate, ha ha ha, now you see my plan, I made it so that Paul and Susan will never get married and have kids!!!
Now I know you are going to jump all over me about how mean I am, but when I told Mom, she said I did the right thing, and as you know, Mom is always right.
At 6:46 PM,
April Patterson said…
yeah, but mom sez u were wrong 2 give that harmonica 2 jesse, so there!
apes
At 10:19 PM,
duncan anderson said…
Hey, Apes, I just got an email from Chips, she says sum gazhagayns (cat) tried 2 rip off Beer's onik (arm) but only got his oningeen (fingers.) Thats got 2 b Faustus. Im leaving Sat am.
I asked Zed 2 come w/ me, she said no way cos she's got an exam on Mon. Zed will get her uni acceptance @ the beginning of March so I dont no y she still cares abt her marks.
L8r.
At 1:28 AM,
Anonymous said…
April,
Well I am pretty sure you are lying about that whole Mom disagreeing about me giving away the harmonica thing, but it doesn't matter anyway, Mtigwaki is a part of my past now, I'm not going to be thinking about it anymore.
Anyway, Gary took me to where Warren's helicopter was going to land and he said, "I must say, girl--you do travel in style!" and I said, "I know! Flying with Warren sure beats the bus!", I liked that he said this, first he was using the proper native form of address for me ("girl") and also it is proper for lowly people like natives to express jealousness and amazemetude over how a Patterson does things, then Gary thanked me for stuff, like smiles and Christmas gifts, and made me promise to keep in touch, and I did, but of course we both knew I was lying, because everyone knows a Patterson has better things to do than to keep in touch with a bunch of people who are not going to ever give you anything like a husband or prime rib dinners, like Mom always says, if you aren't in a position to give something to a Patterson, you don't deserve our friendship.
Anyway, then Gary told me not to be sad for too long because my heart would mend and love would come again, and then Gary hugged me close, and when I thought we had hugged for kind of a long time I looked up and I was going to say, "Hey, are we done hugging yet?" but then Gary kissed me on the mouth, and I was surprised, and he said, "Girl, that's just how a native says goodbye," and I said, "Oh, I thought we were talking about love," and Gary said, "Well girl, I'll talk to you all day about it if you want," and I said, "About what?" and Gary said, "Love, girl!" and I said, "Oh," and Gary said, "Sometimes it's closer than you think," and then Gary winked at me as Warren walked up.
I think Gary was trying to tell me something, I wish I knew what it was, natives are so wise.
Liz
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