It's OK 4 Dad 2 mess up if his client is Mom?

During our celebration dinner last nite @ La Crème de la Crème de Milborough, Dad told us sum story abt doing sum dental work 4 Mom recently. While he was working on Mom's teeth, one of his hygienists popped in 2 tell him that the X-ray developer was on the fritz. And after he told her that he'd deal w/it, she also told him that sum lady named Mrs. Feggmutz just cancelled her 3-hr appt again.

Dad was putting a new crown on one of Mom's teeth, but when she was suppsta "close down gently," she crunched real hard instead, and cracked the crown. Dad thot sum cusses, but only sed, "We've just cracked the crown. We'll order a replacement and I'll put yr temporary back on. 1st, I'll remove the cement from inside it..." Then there was a big "PA-TWANNGG" sound as the temp crown went flying, and Dad thot, "[star] [swirlie] # [saturn] glove is caught in the drill and I've lost the [swirlie] !! [star] temporary!" Then, after he retrieved the temp crown, he was all, "Good thing we found that, or I'd have 2 make another one! OK... I'm going 2 ask U 2 close down gently, please. Gently!!" Then, he thot, "Of course, it doesn't fit. I'll have 2 drill it out sum more, then grind it down...." He finished that all, and he pulled off his mask, saying "There! Nancy will get U a hot towel, and we're all dun!" Then, as he left the xxam room, he kinda fanned himself w/the collar of his hsirt, while saying, "Whoa! [he learned that fr. Everett, his associate] What an awful afternoon! Everything that cd go wrong... went wrong!! ...It's a gd thing I was working on my wife!"

Only, the way he told the story 2 us, he kept the part abt his "client" being Mom a secret until he got 2 that last line of his. He acted like this was a super-terrific punchline 2 a super-terrific joke. Only Mom had this total pinched look on her face that seemed like she didn't think it was funny @ all. And then she pretty much confirmed this by saying that when she heard Dad say that stuff, she sat in the xxam room feeling gobsmacked.

Mike looked fr. Mom 2 Dad an' back a few times. Mom kept having that pinched look, and Dad had that "Oh, no!" look. Then Mike as all, "Well enuf abt Mom an' Dad an' teeth! What abt ME? I'm 31 now!"

And Dad was, like, "Yes! And what a gr8 job we did raising him, Elly! He even rakes w/out being asked!" And Mom was like, "Yes, Mike is such a wonderful yung man! I know the Witch of Corbeil wishes she had a son as gr8 as our Michael!" And then I kinda zoned out 4 a while as they went on an' on, total lovefest. I pictured all the choices* of skirts, pants, shirts, and jackets I have 4 my school uni, and imagined the combinations I mite wear during this coming wk.

Then I noticed that Liz had this kinda faraway look on her face, and I whispered 2 ask her what she was thinking abt. She hissed, "None of yr bizness." I was like, whispering, "U're picturing yrself in wedding dresses, Rn't U?" Then she kinda half-choked on a sob and whispered, "No. Yes." Then she xxcused herself an' ran 2 the ladies room. Mom suddenly stopped mid-praise, and Mike looked kinda annoyed that sumthing interrupted all the Mike-admiring. He kinda elbowed Dee and asked her 2 follow Liz 2 the washroom an' find out what the prob was. Then he was all, "Mom, as U were saying B4 U were so r00dly interrupted."

Then my fone beeped, letting me know I had a txt. It sed, "m @ yr house w/sis h. keep her fr letting perv. jones show up. xoxox ger." B4 I had a chance 2 answer, another txt arrived.: "bro = stupid. i will fix him. h.f." I sent a txt back 2 Ger: "get out! d = pissed @ u. jones @ kool haus 2nite."

NEway, the dinner seemed 2 go on 4evs. 7 courses, 4 hrs. I thot it wd never B over! When Liz and Dee came back from the washroom 30 mins after Liz left the table, Liz's eyes were all red, and Dee xxplained it was just "girl worries."

When we got home, Honoria looked xxhausted, but she sed the kiddies went 2 bed rite on time w/out probs. I was the last 2 B going in2 the house, and I heard a voice loudly whispering from the bushes, "April!" I found Ger hiding in them, and I was, like "Not again! Do U have cabfare and yr fone?" He was like, "Of course I do! But that sister of mine is a conniver! I can't believe what she--" But I didn't have a chance 2 hear the rest of his sentence, cuz Dad was all, "Princess April, R U coming in, or must we keep the door ajar all nite? That wdn't work, b-cuz the door is clearly a door, and not a jar @ all." And he laffed w/his tung sticking out. Yuck. So I hadta go in just then.

Apes

*Yay, it's spring now, so no sweaters!!!