April's Real Blog

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

That's how desper8 I felt

Hey, I'm feeling a bit better, so I'm gonna B checking out of the psych ward this morning, in time 2 go 2 school.

NEway, on that day when Mom and Dad went w/Mike and Dee 2 look @ the Stibbs choo-choo house, and came home w/all that talk abt having Mom and Dad buy it so Mike and Dee cd stay @ our house? W/out NE1 caring 2 consult w/me, even a little? Well, I got really, really bummed. Esp. cuz my Dad had obvs already 4gotten abt me and was imagining himself w/just Mom @ the little house. So I went down 2 the sofa bed in the rec room, where I've been living, and curled up on the bed in the fetal position. I cd even feel myself b-coming all tiny, like a yung child. I was even thinking, "Gloom...Gloom...Gloom."

Well, that's the mo that Liz chose 2 appear, all, "I did it, April! I found an apartment!" I didn't answer her, so she kinda perched herself on2 the edge of the bed, and even tho I had my back turned, I had this feeling that she'd contorted her body in sum weird way. But that's not important rite now. Liz was totally, "Hey, R U listening 2 me?" And I went, "Y? U never listen 2 me." Which is so, so true. And 2 show how true that was, she was like, "I can move in next month! U can move upstairs again! U can have MY room!"

Then, I sat up, squeezed a pillow 2 myself, and sed, "Elizabeth, Mike and Deanna mite buy this house. If they do, I'll have 2 decide where I want 2 live--here or w/Mom and Dad!" And Liz, ever sympathetic, went, "So? Where do U wanna B?" And, with this feeling of total desperation, I was all, "How big is yr place?!!" And Liz looked gobsmacky.

BTW, I received an e-mail from Steph xxplaining that, even tho I had that antidote 2 the special Corbeil Kool-Aid, I'd have these weird after effects for a few days. Mostly, this means that when I C Jeremy Jones, I M likely 2 jump on him, tweak his ear, and command him 2 change "2 good." Sorry, Jeremy--I'll try 2 resist, but Steph warns me that this is mostly futile. Pls prepare!


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  • At 2:23 AM, Anonymous michael patterson said…


    Formerly little sis. There comes a time in a man’s life when he has to think about the past and the present and the future, I guess all time, and wonder about his place in it. I stood on the top of the landing and remembered a conversation I had had with mom in that very spot almost 2 years ago. I could see us clearly talking about how it would nice if I and my family got to live in this house. But then as I looked about I realized my parents’ place looks different today. In fact, when my lovely wife Deanna leaned up against me and put her arm around me, (which she does a lot these days), and asked me, “What are you thinking?”, I told her that exact thing that the place looks different.

    For instance there was a door just to my left on the top of the landing. That wasn’t there when I was talking to mom back in 2005. And there was this big wall on my right where the landing abruptly stopped. That wasn’t there back in 2005. Then I looked down the stairs, and I swear I saw the stairs at the bottom near the rec room, were enormous and facing at odd angles against a flat wall, which connected to a first floor landing which was at yet another odd angle to the flat wall. I remembered the house used to have normal stairs. And here’s the weirdest part, little sis. There was one leg and one arm on top of the leg which extended into the stair well at such an odd angle, I thought there was no way they could belong to a normal human being. Well, little sis, either my parents’ place looks different, or I was starting to get some terrific vertigo.

    I wasn’t dizzy, so I started to think, “Maybe I don’t want to live in such a different-looking place after all.” I speculated out loud to Deanna, “If dad convinces mom to move to the Stibbs’ place…” And I was going to follow that up with, “then we would be practically obligated to buy my parents’ place.” But before I could say that, my lovely Deanna interrupted with her opinion which was, “I’d love to live here, Michael!” What can you say when the little woman comes up with a heartfelt statement like that? You have to give in, is what.

    I was ready to say, “Well then we must buy the place for your sake.” But then my lovely Deanna didn’t stop talking and she stared out into space as if she were seeing something in front. I looked to what she was seeing, but there was nothing there. That didn’t stop her from saying, “Merrie and Robin can play in the same park you played in, slide down the same ravine, make forts in the same yard, go to the same schools…” I was about to say to her, “Deanna, dear. You may not remember this, but we used to go to the same elementary school and we used to live in the same town,” when I was interrupted by the overwhelming feeling someone was making a pun off the word “same” in a thought balloon, but I couldn’t see who it was.

    Then I was struck with an even more terrifying thought. Why doesn’t Deanna remember our common past herself? Her memory is usually much better than mine. I stretched my memory way back to the time when I used to be in school with Deanna. I saw everything clearly. Not only that but the Deanna I used to know in elementary school had a pointed nose, and normally-sized lips. She moved away when I was young, and I saw her again after she had her car accident.

    Could I have been mistaken? Had I presumed that the Deanna Sobinski in the car wreck was the same as the one I knew in elementary school, just because of the similarity of names? I said to Deanna, “We went to the same elementary school you know.” Then Deanna got a strange look on her face and said, “That was a silly mistake I made” and she waved her hand in front of me with an unusual gesture and I suddenly realized that she was actually placing my childhood experience before hers, as a good wife should, and it didn’t have anything at all to do with forgetting our common past. How silly of me to think so.

    Michael Patterson

  • At 2:24 AM, Anonymous jeremy jones said…

    april, my ears still hurt, especially after you did wut u did 2day.


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