April's Real Blog

Friday, August 15, 2008

Giggly-girl bridesmaids

I woke up knowing sum more abt Liz's wedding day, which is eight days away (23 August). Candace will suddenly B acting all giggly and girly, telling Liz, "Lemme fix yr veil, Liz! --U look amazing!" And Shawna-Marie will go, "U need sum more blush!" While applying more blush w/sumthing that looks more like a rubber stamper, Shawna-Marie will say, "This is so cool. U were a bridesmaid at Dawn's and my weddings..." And Dawn will finish w/"And now we're bridesmaids @ yrs." In case U R confused w/how Shawna-Marie will word that, they each had one wedding.

Then here's where Candace's weird girlyness will really come out. Standing behind and slitely 2 the side of Liz, she'll put one hand by the left side of Liz's neck, the other on Liz's rite shoulder, and as Liz looks terrified, she will say, "Let's make a pact, girls. We R gonna B friends 4ever, OK? No matter what happens...." And then the 4 of them will go in2 silhouette and chant, "Friends 4ever! 4ever! 4ever!!!" It'll almost seem like they R trying 2 cast a spell. Does NE1 know if this is how 27-yr-old women normally talk? This seems much younger. Like mayB sumthing U promise yr friends when U all finish middle school. Plus, is Candace even friends w/Dawn and Shawna?

NEway, after that weird chanting, Liz will B all, "But 1st... Let's make it thru 2day!"

And that's all I know from waking up this morning. I wonder why Candace will act so unCandacelike. That kinda disturbs me.


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  • At 8:12 AM, Blogger DreadedCandiru2 said…

    I almost expected to see you in that vision pointing out how adult Liz and the Sisterhood of the Hideous Lavender Dresses weren't behaving. This would have, of course, led to Liz getting frustrated and us laughing instead of being confused. I think maybe she hit her head too hard when she took her first steps.

  • At 9:00 AM, Blogger April Patterson said…

    dc2, i have no idea where i'll b when all this is going on. all i know is i won't b included in this little girl-bonding episode. i guess i'm glad, tho.


  • At 8:31 PM, Blogger howard said…


    I do not mean to disparage your ability to see the future of your sister’s wedding, but wouldn’t Candace Halloran’s unCandacelike behaviour be an indication that perhaps this was a dream and not the way it will really happen for your sister’s wedding? After all, you said that you don’t see yourself present for this particularly youthful display of feminine affection between your sister’s friends who hardly know each other. If it does or does not happen, you would never know, eh?

    Howard Bunt

  • At 8:33 PM, Anonymous michael patterson said…


    Formerly little sis. I told my wife, the lovely Deanna, about your prediction of your sister and 3 of her bridesmaids chanting, “Let's make a pact, girls. We are going to be friends forever, OK? No matter what happens...." Deanna said, “Elizabeth has so much to learn about friendship. When I was planning my second, fake wedding; I thought my sister and my friend Judy and your sisters would be my best friends forever. Then Judy decided she didn’t want to be in my wedding, and I had to ask Maxine Hébert to take her place at the last minute.”

    Then I said, “I remember Maxine. She was your best friend who worked for a software company in the administration offices. Is she still looking for Mister Right?” Deanna said, “How would I know? I haven’t seen her since my wedding. I haven’t seen my sister, Andrea and her family out in Halifax since my wedding. In fact, I barely saw your sister Elizabeth since my wedding, until she started preparing for her wedding. Your sister may think these women are her friends, but she will learn. How she will learn. Keeping friends after you’re married is hard work. I pity her already. Poor thing.”

    Deanna muttered a lot more about it, but I stopped paying attention. Too much girl talk for me. Maybe you will have something a little more interesting to predict tomorrow.

    Michael Patterson

  • At 9:29 PM, Blogger April Patterson said…

    howard, i can't xxplain HOW i know the stuff i know abt liz's wedding day, but sumhow i just KNOW it. it's weird.

    what i think u r thinking is how can i prove it? obviously i can't until the day gets here so we can c if all the stuff comes true. yr question where u go, "If it does or does not happen, you would never know, eh?" that's kinda weird. what do u mean i'd "never know"? rn't i allowed 2 talk 2 candace, dawn, shawna-marie, and liz abt stuff they say and do when i'm not there? and what abt the stuff i already shared abt mom, connie, annie, anthony, and gordo? same thing, rite? i'd have 2 find out fr. other ppl. sha, y r u picking on me, neway?

    mike, i don't know if i'll have stuff 2 tell that's more interesting, more boring, or the same amt of boring. i guess i'll know in the morning.



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