April's Real Blog

Sunday, August 24, 2008

The Day After

Well. The Day has passed. But, U know, it'll take me days and days 2 tell U abt it, and I can't even get up 2 the actual vows 2day!

While walking Nizzie down the aisle, Dad was thinking, "::sniff:: It's Elizabeth's wedding day... And I have 2 keep reminding myself.... that I'm not losing a daughter... ...I'm gaining an accountant." Har dee har.

Once he's delivered Liz 2 the Antman's side, the officiant will B all, "Elizabeth and Anthony, 2day yr firends and families R here 2 witness yr marriage, yr lifetime commitment 2 one another." Kinda like Anthony's lifetime commitment 2 Thérèse 5 yrs B4, eh? Then, he'll continue: "They will hear the vows U R soon 2 make. They will share w/U this joyous and solemn occasion and will B there 2 guide and support U...."

Anthony and Liz will look @ ea other sideways while the officiant goes, "Knowing that marriage is one of the most important obligations that NE 2 ppl will ever swear 2 uphold." Yeah, Anthony has sum xxperience swearing 2 uphold that obligation. 2 Thérèse.

Weed gestured for me 2 step away from the bridesmaid line a bit so he cd snap a pic of me w/Mom and Dad as the officiant went, "Marriage is a challenge, but so too... It is love. Marriage is patience and giving and caring and faith. It is honesty and openness and thoughtfulness and truth..." Yeah, unless U marry Thérèse? Then officiant-guy went on, "In that yr understanding of one another will lead 2 a gr8er understanding of yrself."

Weed went 2 the front and took a crowd shot while the officiant sed this: "Marriage is friendship and respect. It's the willingness to accept yr partner's qualities and differences, weak and strong." Unless yr partner is Thérèse, rite, Ant? Officiant went, "It is a promise made... And a lasting, successful, caring marriage is a promise kept... Again and again and again." @ that moment, Anthony and Liz shared a thought bubble of "I promise." Mom and Dad also thought, "I promise," only they had individual his-and-hers thought bubbles.

While that last bit was going on, I cd swear I cd hear people snf-snf-snffing, cutting sumthing out, and putting sumthing on their fridge doors. I have a feeling a bunch of those ppl will show up @ Lilliput's 2morrow 2 have coffee w/Mom and tell her how they had tears in their eyes cuz Lizzie's wedding reminds them of [their own/their kid's/their other relative's] wedding, and blahblahblah shoot-me-now.


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  • At 9:21 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Well, at least your father is honest. All this means to him is that he can obtain the services of someone who can help him cheat on his taxes and hide impulse purchases from your mom.

  • At 10:09 AM, Blogger Susan T-O said…

    Can't your folks ever let someone else have their glory? They can't even watch their eldest daughter get married without applying the vows to themselves! Sheesh.

  • At 11:44 AM, Blogger April Patterson said…

    dc2, yeah, i have a feeling anthony doesn't quite grasp what he is getting in2 w/my fam.

    susan t-o, so true! and i have a feeling those "coffee" ppl who show up @ lilliput's 2morrow will b going on & on abt how touching that is.


  • At 8:33 PM, Anonymous michael patterson said…


    Formerly little sis. Your story-telling speed does leave a little to be desired. Even with 2 weeks of predictions about what was going to happen on Elizabeth’s wedding day, you still haven’t managed to get to the point where I made my speech. I can congratulate you on the accuracy of your predictions, and when the time comes for you to tell the story about my speech, I only hope that you will leave out the part where I said, “Now that I have concluded my speech, I am ready for you to lift me up on your shoulders and parade me around.” When no one did that, I thought I did a very credible imitation of a speaker being carried around, until the part where I fell down those stairs. However, you should remember that Elizabeth’s wedding day was her day; so if you leave that part out, it would be a consideration to her and your record of the event.

    Needless to say, my children performed flawlessly and they did not allow that little Quebecoise flower girl to cause them to falter in their ring-bearing and flower girl duties. I did notice, however, that when the wedding officiate indicated that all the couples should sit on each other’s laps (an unusual tradition), my son was in front of the little Quebecoise flower girl to get ready for a good sitting. Thank goodness you were there to stop that. It’s one thing for adults watching a wedding to sit in each other’s laps, but it’s a whole different thing when children without established childhood sweethearts do that.

    I noticed you completely skipped over the part where Dawn and Shawna-Marie were both moving around to get to the spot for the matron of honour next to Elizabeth. That was a little embarrassing. Elizabeth really should have picked one and not left that to fate.

    And the moment when dad delivered Elizabeth and then tried to sit down beside mom, only to find Connie Poirier was already there, I was glad you left that little scuffle out of your description. Dad had Connie by the ear twisting it and said, “Get up, and scoot over.” And Connie said, “I’m scooting. I’m scooting.” Then mom said, “John…I never knew you could fight.” Then dad said, “Neither did I! I guess this was the first time I had something worth fighting for!” Then mom said, “To sit by me?” And Dad said, “No. This is the most comfortable seat out here. Look at the cushions!” That little fracas was best left out of your description.

    Then for some reason I did not quite grasp, the Crow lady and Auntie Georgia kept switching spots. I thought I overheard Georgia say to the Crow lady that someone her age was better matched to the Crow man than she was, and she should consider Uncle Phil instead, who looked more like her age. That doesn’t make sense, so I am sure I must have misheard that. Nevertheless, Auntie Georgia and the Crow lady switched places a few times.

    I think the whole wedding was a smashing successful and it was almost as good as my wedding ceremony. Of course there were a few things that happened which might be considered slight flaws, but I am sure you will cover them thoroughly as the week progresses, and put them in the appropriate light.

    Michael Patterson


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